Super Shifty: Number 8
by Fairly Odd Ghost
Summary: Levi Hargreeves never got a painting or a statue like Ben and Five when he vanished 17 years ago. But he did get back to the academy just in time to see Bens statue decapitated at a funeral, even though the rest of the Hargreeves thought they'd never see him again. And Five what do you MEAN the 'apocalypse' is in eight days? "Suprise?"
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

* * *

Sir Reginald Hargreeves, eccentric billionaire and adventurer sought to locate and adopt as many of the 43 children born from the most unusual of circumstances.

He adopted eight of them.

However, as time flew by that number shrunk down to seven. Then down to six. And then down to five. Two disappeared, and one died. The tragedies were buried deep within the remaining five who eventually left the academy to pursue their own careers and lives; except for Luther, Number One, who remained with Reginald trying to keep the hope in the disbanded team alive.

They all knew of Bens death, Number 6. Five… well, he ran away from what they could understand so it was impossible to know where he was or whether he was alive.

Levi Hargreeves, Number Eight, went missing without a trace as well. It happened roughly the same year as Five's dissapearance. However, the children had fuzzier memories of Levi since he hadn't been privileged with having anything to commemorate him as Five and Ben had received, and they were all still so young when he vanished. Twelve years old to be exact, borderline turning thirteen. Levi had been the first to go, and Reginald had gone white with fury when informed of his disappearance. The remaining children hadn't been allowed their Saturdays to be free from training for a whole year after that.

After all, it was partly their fault that Levi went missing seventeen years ago.

* * *

"Well, since we're out here we could play hide and seek." Luther declared, watching Allison prance ahead of the group.

"Hide and seek?" Klaus all but snorted in amusement at the proposal.

"Not a bad idea. Means if dad comes after us, we'll all be hiding." Allison's dress twirled around her knees as she swirled around with a bright smile, meeting Luther's fond eyes.

They had all decided to dress in casual clothes today, after all, they weren't supposed to have left the mansion grounds without supervision. But the twelve-year-old superheroes had decided they were old enough and powerful enough to go out by themselves now. So casual clothes would help them to blend in better. They were only really breaking the rules because Levi had insisted so considering he was technically grounded by their dad for skipping training. Levi was known in the household for being a little...rebellious at times.

Luther nodded gratefully to Allison but frowned. "We're not hiding from him if he comes after us. We're already breaking enough rules so-"

"Lighten up, we never do this kind of thing." Diego groaned at Luther's oncoming lecture about rule-breaking. "Consider this… our official day off."

Ben anxiously tapped his fingers together while gazing around the fairly quiet park that had some children running around being idly watched by their parents who sat to the side on benches talking amongst each other. "Are you sure we're safe?"

"Of course we are. We're the umbrella academy." Diego declared, puffing out his chest.

"It's only the park, Ben," Allison added.

"The park isn't the problem. Dads going to be so angry about us sneaking out like this." Luther muttered with doubt.

That made the smallest of their group pipe up. "Aw come on Luth, don't be a spoilsport! Can't we just be normal kids for a day?" Levi asked with mischievous eyes that managed to extinguish the doubt in Luther's mind within seconds, replacing it with a growing giddiness.

Klaus put on puppy eyes to Luther. "Yeah, you're being the spoiliest of sports right now."

Allison caught onto the act and leaned forwards towards Luther. "Come on, just for a little bit, please?" she begged softly.

"Alright fine we can stay. Only three hours though!" Luther decided for them. Most decisions were 'made' by Luther given that he was number one. However, the team had learned that certain individuals were able to sway his decisions a little bit. "And all of you have to do the explaining if we get caught."

The group whooped in delight and Vanya cocked her head to the side. "Should we have rules? Like… you guys can't use your powers?" she suggested meekly and blushed when all eyes landed on her. "I mean… you said you wanted to be normal kids…"

Levi gaped for a moment before nodding. "Yep, no powers. V is right. It's only fair."

"Aw shucks, I was gonna call a dead guy to come help me choose a spot." Klaus retorted sarcastically.

"Alright, no powers. No teleporting, no rumours, and no shapeshifting." Luther glared at the white-haired boy in particular.

Levi put on a cheeky grin and placed a hand over his heart. "I would never break my own rules!"

Diego snickered at Levi and shoved him before bolting ahead towards the swings in the centre of the park. "The last one to the swings is the seeker!" he announced.

"Hey! Cheater!" Came Levi's voice from behind as the other children raced towards the swings, Five teleporting there and resting against the pole with a look of boredom. Levi wasn't a natural athlete, and after being shoved to the ground by Diego he found himself predictably reaching the swing set last to face the smug faces of his team-mates. "You all cheated."

"Technically only Diego cheated." Allison countered.

Diego rose his hands in the air. "No idea what you're talking about."

Vanya took pity on him. "I don't mind being it if you want."

Levi's scowl softened and he sighed and shook his head. "Fine, you've all got thirty seconds before I come find you." He said moodily, crossing his arms and glaring at the dirt.

Klaus, finding it highly amusing that their prankster of the group had to be the seeker, poked Levi's arm playfully "You're supposed to cover your eyes."

Exasperatedly Levi slowly rose his arm over his eyes. "One, two, three-"

All the children squealed and scattered in several directions to go find their hiding places. Allison went and hid among a cluster of flowers, her yellow dress allowing her to blend in with the rows and rows of daffodils if she led down. Vanya took to hiding with Klaus behind the park wall, not really concealed very well. Ben panicked when everybody ran and tip-toed his way around the seeker into the park activities to crawl into the kids' tunnel and lie there, instantly regretting his decision but having no time to move. Five ignored the no powers rule, teleporting straight to the top of the Oaktree in the centre of the park and pulling out his notebook to continue the maths equation he'd been working on. Luther and Diego had similar ideas to hide in the treeline of the park which Diego found infuriating and demanded Luther left to find another spot, but the blonde refused and it resulted in an argument that was only halted by Levi's loud shout.

"Ready or not, here I come!"

And so they all held their breaths and waited…

And waited…

And waited.

Until eventually at least an hour and a half had passed by and they were all growing increasingly impatient, feeling cramped and bored. Klaus and Vanya had started coming to the conclusion that Levi was pulling a prank on them and was just waiting for them to show themselves. Diego and Luther had similar ideas. All of them were too stubborn to be the first to give in.

An hour and a half passed and the sunshine from earlier had disappeared, grey clouds forming that gradually began sprinkling rain.

Ben was the first of them to cave, wriggling out from the playground tube and scanning the area for his siblings. None of them were in sight. To Ben this instantly made him nervous, feeling alone in the park which seemed emptier than it had before.

"Guys?" he called out, wandering out onto the grass and doing a 360 turn on his heels. "If you all ditched me again…"

"Calm down Ben." Diego's voice rang as he emerged from the treeline with Luther following him, both of their expressions sour from being crouched beside each other for well over an hour. "I refuse to spend another second alone with him."

"The feeling is mutual," Luther grumbled.

Allison came into sight raising her arms in a W shape, her hair drenched. "It's been hours. Did you guys get found? I'm bored."

Five teleported down beside her, stuffing his notebook into his pocket and staring at his watch. "One and a half hours to be exact."

"I'm bored too, let's do something else." Luther proposed.

"In case you didn't realise people are still hiding." Diego huffed and cupped his mouth "Klaus! Vanya! Levi!" he shouted.

Klaus' head popped up over the wall. "Did we win!?" he asked hopefully, Vanya's head popping up next to his.

Ben shook his head. "So nobody got found. Where's Levi?"

Klaus furrowed his eyebrows, having hopped the wall and joined the group with Vanya. "Levi's missing?" he asked, worry seeping into his voice. "Levi!" he then shouted, turning frantically to search over the park.

"Levi! Come out! We're the ones hiding, not you!" Ben called as well.

"Levi!?" Allison joined in.

"Hold on," Luther ordered, sensing the growing panic and holding up his hands to calm the team. "Let's just take a moment. He's probably just trying to fool us; you know what he's like."

Allison nibbled on her bottom lip then said, "But it's been hours."

"Did anybody see him whilst they were hiding?" Diego asked them and they all shook their heads. "Maybe he is fooling us. He could be anybody in this park right now for all we know."

"Or he could be in trouble," Vanya said quietly.

Luther glared, "Not helping."

"I saw him." Five announced dully, straining his forehead to think "I was up in the old Oaktree and glanced down for a second, I saw him heading towards the entrance, I think. I didn't see him after that, but I was busy doing equations."

Klaus shook his head, "You're the only weirdo I know who does maths for fun."

Allison sighed, "So he went back home?"

"Maybe. Why would he leave alone?" Diego asked in confusion, "and without telling us." He added.

Luther growled and faced the park again, looking at each person in it. There were only a few adults who were gathering two remaining children from the playground to leave due to the rain. "Levi if you're here this isn't funny!" he called out.

"Luther, what do we do?" Allison asked anxiously.

"I…" Luther thought deeply for a moment. "We search the park quickly for him just in case, then we return home. He's probably at home right now laughing at us."

Klaus stared at the people and pointed. "Should we ask if they've seen him?"

"Just search the park," Luther ordered sharply and they all nodded and split up again.

Minutes later they had scoured every inch of the park, having no luck finding the shapeshifter. Annoyingly, Levi could just be blended in with his surroundings watching them all run around panicking. But Levi wouldn't do that, this prank was a bit far-fetched and deep down they all knew that. However, it was easier for them to tell themselves that Levi had gone home intending on pranking them rather than search for darker alternative explanations.

So they returned home, not one of them speaking and a certain urgency to their pace. Once they arrived home their mom greeted them with a warm smile.

"Well hello, Darlings, where ever have you all been this morning? You drove Pogo into a fit of worry." She told them with a sweet smile, leading them straight into the kitchen and picking up a plate "I prepared cookies for your return."

"Thanks, Mom." Diego nodded but none of them took a cookie. "Is Levi back?" he inquired, trying to keep his tone neutral.

Their mom kept her smile, but it strained as her eyes began darting over each of them doing a mental headcount. "Nobody has entered the house today except you children. I thought he came back with you dears?" She asked them, the cookie plate being put down, hitting the table slightly too hard showing Grace's rising tension.

All seven children paled.

* * *

None of them had ever seen their dad so angry. When the news reached him that Number Eight was missing he was shaking with fury and jumped up from his desk, papers scattering everywhere. There was no time for them to have a lecture about sneaking out, Reginald was already sprinting down the stairs and out the front door with the phone, Grace and Pogo following. The children all sat on the stairs and waited once again, having been forbidden to accompany the search.

Nightfall came before their father returned. They were all still sat stiffly on the stairs when the front door opened, Reginald waltzing in with his cane in hand, drenched from the rain and glaring at them. Grace and Pogo sadly trailed inside and avoided the children's panicked stares when Levi didn't come bouncing into the room laughing.

The way Reginald had yelled at them that evening... none of them ever wanted to relive it.

The news got out faster than expected; a boy from the umbrella academy was missing. The public had always liked Levi, they would spray paint their hair white to be like his, children liked him because he'd pull funny faces by shifting his features into animal ones behind Reginald's back as he spoke to the reporters. That had always gotten him in trouble. So, when they learned it was Levi missing the search for him was massive. Millions upon millions were donated to find out where he went, shockingly enough mostly funded by Reginald himself who would stay up later in his office than before. Pogo suspected he was trying to find the young shapeshifter.

That was the problem, Levi was a shapeshifter. If he wanted to stay hidden, he could stay hidden by turning into somebody completely different.

The only clue they ever received about where Levi went came to them a few weeks later. Somebody had claimed that they had seen a boy being carried away by an older man a few blocks away from the park. Allegedly this boy had white hair. But there was no valid proof or suitable description of the man or whether it had actually been Levi.

Which of course reached them all like a bucket of ice-cold water being dumped over their heads. It meant Levi potentially hadn't run away, hadn't had an accident, hadn't been pulling a really elaborate prank on them. It meant he'd potentially been kidnapped. It meant that they weren't the almighty, untouchable Umbrella Academy they originally thought they were. It flooded the children with the guilt of not realising sooner that Levi had potentially been in real danger whilst they were all too stubborn to swallow their pride and leave their hiding spots. Of course, that clue fizzled into a dry lead eventually and they were forced to go back to the drawing board.

Then one day all that searching stopped. One day Levi Hargreeves no longer mattered to Reginald no matter how determined the children were to find him.

However, years passed by and Levi Hargreeves was never found. After Ben died, the team barely held themselves together for much longer, disbanding the second they all turned eighteen and not looking back

* * *

EXTRA ORDINARY, My Life as Number 7, by Vanya Hargreeves

CHAPTER 2 – Levi, Number 8 (Mimic)

_There was a time that we were all actually connected, once upon a time that is. But that seems like a lifetime ago. I used to tell myself our first loss was what really separated us, but now I realise it was our first loss that made us grow up faster than we were supposed to. Number Eight our father would call him, to the public he became known as Mimic, but I knew him as Levi Hargreeves. To this day he is still lost to us._

_My brother always was an enigma despite his charismatic ways, even before he disappeared. His power ensured he was never who he truly was, correction, our fathers' manipulation of his power made him so that he could never be who he truly was. He could turn into the president, a carbon copy of one of us, he could even adopt animalistic features if he chose to. I used to call his shapeshifting ability his 'mask' that he used, especially when trying to control his emotions._

_But he always had a playful persona, a way of making us all feel like we really were just kids not superhero soldiers in the making. Likewise, I might have been ordinary, but Levi never treated me like I was. The only memories I have of him are childish ones, games, pranks and mischief that would drive our father up the wall. He was… the glue that kept us together in my opinion. The unofficial little brother of the group. It was probably the same childish behaviour that led to his disappearance; after all, it was only a game of hide and seek we were trying to play. His idea originally to leave the house and go to the park. Another attempt to act like we were just like all the other twelve-year-olds out there._

_We never were just like all the other twelve-year-olds though, were we? Twelve-year-olds don't fight crime and have superpowers._

_Levi tried dragging us back down to normalcy, unaware that he was really dragging us to his disappearance. We hid for hours, waiting for him to find us when we should have been searching for him. A horrible twist of fate. Maybe if we had listened to Luther and stayed at home… or if Luther hadn't of suggested we play hide and seek… or if Diego didn't shove Levi down so he lost the deciding race on who had to be the seeker…maybe he would still be with us today._

_We were just kids. We thought he was pulling another prank on us at first. How could we have imagined that one of the mighty Umbrella Academy's members had been potentially taken from us or hurt? After all, it wasn't uncommon for him to pull pranks on us. Never malicious or at this extent, but perhaps Levi was living his own 'the boy who cried wolf' moment. It was only our mothers worry when we returned home one number short that we realised he really wasn't playing a prank. A few days later he was officially marked as a missing person, and our lives changed._

_I wish I could write about what happened to him. Did he run away? Get taken? Hit by a car? We never found out. I can only tell the stories of what happened before that day. Not that our father cared for long that one of us was missing. Levi didn't get a statue or a painting like Ben and Five did. In fact, every photo of him was erased from the house. It was like… our father was taking the memories we had left of him away. Our father forbade us from saying his name, forbade us from continuing our search for him, and forbade us from even thinking about him anymore._

_Eventually Number Eight, Mimic, and Levi Hargreeves only existed in our minds._

* * *

**AN: Hi! Welcome to the story!**

** Clearing a few things up before we start and if you want to go further lol, firstly Levi is PROBABLY going to be paired with Klaus. PROBABLY. Just a disclaimer for that, and that Levi's backstory is probably going to be quite dark (COUGH spoilers but i feel like i need to put a warning for that) but i'll try keep it as lighthearted as i can (Considering this is one heck of a dysfunctional lot...might be difficult!)**

**Anyway i hope you enjoy! Next chapter will start following the TV show.**


	2. Taking This One To The Grave

**Taking This One To The Grave**

* * *

**17 years later…**

'_Moments ago, police-reported the death of one of the most eccentric and reclusive billionaires-'_

That message was broadcasted on every news channel, travelling far and wide to reach the ears of all the Hargreeves children who each felt compelled to return home once again. Luther, Number One, received a transmission from Pogo one morning during his solo mission on the moon. Diego, Number Two, happened to overhear the news while stopping a burglary, the tv having been left on by the family he was saving. Allison, Number Three, was not privileged with having a relatively private reaction like her other siblings were, learning of the death while walking the red carpet and getting bombarded by paparazzi. Klaus, Number Four, fresh out of rehab simply overdosed within 24 hours and heard the news in the back of an ambulance on a radio. Vanya, Number Seven, was returning from practicing her violin in an empty theatre, passing a television store and seeing her father's face on every screen.

Another also stared in shock at a television screen, tugging in worry at his white hair and pacing the hotel room he was currently staying in. Then he promptly called for a taxi.

* * *

All of them arrived on the same miserable day, returning to the place they dared to call home partly just to see if the news was true, whether their father truly had passed away. Of course, for an academy it had a homey sort of atmosphere lingering, probably more down to the fact they were raised here rather than its decor. It seemed relatively similar to a boarding school perhaps but littered with the oddities that their father decorated the place with.

Was an academy really supposed to be a place that children ever wanted to call home?

Vanya was the last to arrive, walking into the building that practically drowned her small figure in its vastness and sent chills racing down her spine at its cold familiarity. Upon heading inside there was instant regret forming inside of her, unsure what to expect from her siblings she hadn't seen in so long. Would they be angry? Would they be disappointed? Would they even notice her arriving?

The first thing Vanya noticed as she passed the living room was her mother sat on an armchair staring blankly into the fireplace; watching the flames dance. She was just how Vanya remembered, nothing ever seemed to change about their mother, she didn't grow or show signs of age. A product of their fathers' creations. Just as they were. Truthfully, Grace was just another artificial part of their childhood.

"Mom?" she called out, not even getting a flinch from her mother who just continued staring blankly into the flames. She wasn't human, but she was certainly grieving like one. Vanya chose to leave it.

"Vanya? You're actually here." Allison's voice rang out, Vanya turning to find her sister dressed in some black trousers and a royal blue blouse, descending the grand stairs in the foyer. Her sister had always been obsessed with fashion and appearances, understandably so being in the eye of the public almost 24/7.

"Hey, Allison."

"Hey, sis." She greeted, chuckling softly and hugging Vanya; coming as a pleasant surprise to the much shorter girl. Well, Allison wasn't outright showing whether she was angry or not which was a good start. Admittedly she'd missed seeing her sister the most after the family had shunned her for the things she said in her autobiography.

Then the initial relief was broken as Diego waltzed by.

"What's she doing here? You don't belong here. Not after what you did." Diego announced bitterly as he passed them still wearing in his gear. The words felt like the twisting of a knife in Vanya's gut that had been there for years; she hadn't missed that feeling.

Allison sighed and put her hands in her pockets, eyes following Diego as he crossed the room to the stairs. "You're seriously gonna do this today?" she asked, and he ignored her. "Way to dress for the occasion, by the way."

"At least I'm wearing black." Diego retorted.

Vanya cast her gaze downwards. "You know what? I – Maybe he's right. And I shouldn't-"

"I'm glad you're here." Allison cut her off, a seriousness to her tone that made Vanya's lip twitch upwards gratefully.

* * *

She found herself wandering alone in the living room, mom had disappeared downstairs shortly after Diego left. There were pictures after pictures of the Umbrella Academy children, all excluding her of course. Well, all excluding her and one other. So, she found herself drawn to the bookshelf, scanning it until her eyes froze on the title '_Extraordinary, my Life as Number Seven, by Vanya Hargreeves'. _The book had a photograph of her on it, possibly the only photograph of her in this whole house.

Inside the book was her handwriting, reading _'Dad, I figured, why not? – V.'_ the words so familiar it felt like she'd just been writing them yesterday and contemplating with riddled nerves whether to actually risk sending the book here for her father to read and scrutinise. Idly she flipped through the pages, recalling the things she'd written about everybody. The so-called awful things everybody else claimed her to have said. Then she froze upon reaching chapter 2.

'_Levi Hargreeves, Number 8 (Mimic)'_

Vanya's lip twitched into a sad smile at the memory of her lost brother, the older they grew the more difficult it was to remember everything. Despite how much pain this book brought her it still kept alive the memory of Levi, some of her fondest recollections of him compiled into one short but sweet chapter. A symbol of their childhood perhaps. Likewise, this book didn't just hold complaints about their childhood, it held memories of Levi… of Five… of Ben… her memories. And the others hated it. They resented it and everything about her perspective of their lives.

"Welcome home, Ms. Vanya." Pogo's softly aged voice said behind her and she swerved around to see the ape stood at the doorway leaning on his walking stick.

"Pogo." She found herself smiling shyly as she crossed the distance between them.

He hummed and patted her back as she lent down to his height to hug him. "So good to see you." He said, then his gaze fell on the book clutched in her hand when they pulled apart. "Ah, yes, your autobiography." There was no disappointment in his tone, maybe a slight edge of hurt but no disappointment.

She frowned, "Do you know if um… did he ever read it?"

He shook his head. "Not that I'm aware of."

She nodded, expecting that answer if she was perfectly honest. She changed the topic by looking to Five's portrait hung above the fireplace. "How long has it been since Five disappeared?"

"It's been sixteen years, four months, and fourteen days. Your father insisted I keep track" Pogo said sadly. "Likewise, it's been sixteen years, eight months and six days since Levi's disappearance, in case you were curious."

"So, we're allowed to talk about him now that dads gone?" She replied indignantly.

"You know he only prevented you from doing so to lessen the pain," Pogo told her with a heavy sigh, but she could see through the practically transparent excuse Pogo used to cover for their dad.

"And losing Five and Ben wasn't painful?" She countered then shook her head. "I'm sorry… it's just a difficult day," she admitted, realising she was beginning to grill Pogo who really wasn't at fault for their siblings' disappearances.

She always suspected their dad stopped them from talking about Levi because of whatever happened to Five, thinking that maybe Five went looking for Levi and something happened in the process. That seemed like the only logical conclusion she could think of as to why they couldn't talk about him for the second half of their childhood. But who was to say? Their father had always had a strange way with most things, so whatever his reasoning was they would probably never understand it fully.

Pogo understood perfectly. "Yes, a day I never thought would come so soon." he agreed.

"You want to know something stupid? I always used to leave the lights on for them. Five and Levi. I was always scared they'd come back; it would be late, and the house would be dark, and they wouldn't be able to find us…. So then they'd leave again. So, every night I'd make a little snack and make sure all the lights were on."

Pogo smiled at that. "Oh, I remember your snacks. I'm pretty sure I stepped in half those peanut butter and marshmallow sandwiches." They chuckled softly but without the added effort of straining to smile this time. "Your father always believed that number Five and Levi were still out there somewhere. He never lost hope."

"And look where that got him."

* * *

Despite the house being full, it had never felt emptier. Nobody stuck around each other to catch up with simple pleasantries here, there was no sense of warmth that the siblings outwardly showed to one another. Perhaps that was more due to the day's events rather than their relationships with each other. Nevertheless, everybody felt the tense atmosphere cling right to their bones and force them to lurk around the old house alone.

Luther had barely seen any of his siblings yet but Pogo had informed him some had arrived. Instead of choosing to greet them he took to inspecting upstairs in Sir Reginald's room; the very room he passed away in. Pogo had also informed him that his father's monocle had been missing, which had been just enough encouragement to make suspicion rise in Luther who was now searching for anything out of the ordinary that indicated towards their fathers' demise transpiring due to anything other than natural causes.

Likewise, Luther was fairly certain that he out of all the children had known dad the best, therefore, he was perfectly justified in claiming that a meagre heart attack was not the true downfall of Reginald. After all, how could it be? Their father was a billionaire! A genius! How could something like _that_ kill him?

From down the corridor, Diego was lurking, hearing Luther rummage through their dads' room which brought him a distinct joy at the prospect of messing with his brother. It added a perk to his step as he slipped into the room, leaning against the doorway and watching Luther scan the window for signs of a break-in. Obviously, there wasn't, Diego had already checked.

"I can save you some time." Diego announced his presence boldly, "They're all locked. No forced entry, no sign of struggle. Nothing out of the ordinary." He clarified, advancing into the room and just then getting a proper look at Luther whose appearance…well, it looked like puberty had hit him twice in one go. It caught Diego mildly off guard and made him pause to double-check his eyes were functioning correctly. "Oh, you got big Luther. What's the secret, huh? Protein shakes? Low Carbs?" he quipped teasingly.

Luther shook his head with irritation, not entirely up for his brother's mockery today. "What do you want?" he asked simply, not wanting to go into elaborate about his 'secret'. His body was a bit of a touchy subject to him after, _ahem_, the incident.

In response, Diego unfolded a piece of paper from his pocket and held it out for Luther to take. "The autopsy report" he revealed, then jerked his hand away when Luther tried to take it, smirking. "Ah." Then he handed it over properly, getting it snatched from his fingers by Luther to view it.

"You have this why?"

"Well, that's because I… broke into the coroner's office." Diego declared smugly, seating himself lazily on the armchair like they weren't attending a funeral later today. "And surprise, surprise, dad's death was…normal. Just boring, old heart failure."

"Yeah, so?"

"So, why are you in here, checking all the windows," Diego asked, already knowing the answer.

"Were you the first one on the scene?"

"Pogo found him."

"Yeah, I talked to Pogo. He said he couldn't find dads monocle."

A tiny scoff came from the doorway, drawing both their attention onto a woman leaning against the door frame with folded arms; neither of them had even heard her arrive. Both of them were slightly taken aback because… the woman was… well beautiful. The best way to describe her from first glance was that she was the definition of model material, in an exotic sort of way with her striking red hair that had been straightened into perfection; hanging in place at her shoulders. Not only that but she wore a jet black off the shoulder dress that hugged the curves of her body with matching satin gloves that reached her wrists; she'd come dressed for the occasion apparently, with the same 'dress to impress' approach that Allison had gone for. But she definitely didn't look like she belonged here in the weirdness of the academy.

Which led to the second reason they were taken aback; neither of them knew why she was stood at the doorway to their fathers' room. Additionally, despite being utterly breath-taking, her face was contoured into a picture of vexation.

"Sorry to interrupt but did you say that's the autopsy report?" She asked pointedly staring at the paper in Luther's hand, eyes briefly meeting Luther's then darting back to the paper; almost like she was deliberately trying to avoid eye contact with them.

Then without giving either of them a chance to stop catching flies with their mouths, she strode across the room towards Luther; heels clicking against the ground as she passed Diego who's eyebrows skyrocketed.

"I'm sorry who are you?" Luther finally managed to ask as she stopped in front of him.

"She's not with you?" Diego shot quickly back at Luther in confusion.

"I thought she was with you." Luther retaliated defensively.

"Autopsy report. Is that it?" She cut them off more curtly this time, clearly being driven on impatience that was fuelled by whatever she'd initially been frustrated about. "No wonder the coroner couldn't find it when I asked."

Luther narrowed his eyes. "You didn't answer my question-" He began but the woman just rolled her eyes and simply snatched the paper from his hands, whirling around and marching back out the room without another word.

Diego now kicked into motion, realising some random women was now walking away with an autopsy he'd stolen and could potentially get in trouble for. "Hey! Stop!" he shouted, striding straight after her with Luther scrambling to be in front of him as they followed the woman down the hallway; who was surprisingly fast for somebody in heels. Neither of them had to run but they certainly had to hasten their pace to keep up with her.

She purposefully ignored them, keeping her eyes glued to the paper as she continued down the hallway towards the stairwell, beginning to shake her head in frustration as she read the paper. "Heart failure? _Heart failure?_ Are you kidding me? I go through all of that stress just for his heart to fail, typical. If he was going to kick the bucket couldn't he have at least waited five more days…" she growled to herself, Luther and Diego only hearing small snippets of her sentence.

"Hey, lady that right there is ours! Do we even know you? How did you get in here!?" Diego fired questions at her back as they descended the stairs now.

"Slow down," Luther added, jogging down the stairs and overtaking her to block the exit. That did seem to matter to her, she just stopped in the middle of the corridor staring at the photo of their dead dad attached to the autopsy. "Where are you going? Are you with the coroner's division? If not hand that back over."

"_And_ start talking," Diego yelled this time, catching her attention at last as her eyes trailed up and landed on them. It was as if she'd only just _fully_acknowledged their presence, ironing out her frustration into curiosity. "You know what nobody here is having a very nice day so could you hand that back over and there doesn't have to be any trouble."

She held up the autopsy teasingly in her grasp "You mean the autopsy that you stole?"

"Yeah, the autopsy that _I_ stole that _you_ stole from me so hand it back over." He ordered, holding his hand out expectantly.

"Luckily for you, I'm not here on the coroner's behalf so I won't report you for illegally taking this, though I could so watch the attitude." She retorted smoothly, folding the paper back up and handing it over to Diego, jerking her hand away when he reached for it which made him flare with anger "Ah." She teased, mimicking what he did to Luther. Admittedly Luther got a pang of satisfaction from watching that. Before Diego could kick up more of a fuss, she handed it back over.

"_Thank you._" He said sarcastically. "Care to tell us your name sweetheart?"

"Luther? Who's this?" Allison asked, descending the stairs behind them with Klaus following her, his jacket pockets jingling with what was most likely stolen trinkets. They'd both heard the commotion and come to investigate.

"Oh!" Klaus' excited voice exclaimed. "Goodie, a family gathering in the hallway. I've been meaning to say hi to you all- wait when did we adopt a ginger into the family? I thought I said I wanted to be the first to go ginger." he pouted, staring at the woman who rose a delicate eyebrow at the jingling coming from his pockets.

Luther paused for a moment; this having been the first time he'd seen Allison since… well since before his mission on the moon was even assigned which was reaching well over four years ago at this point. She looked… good. Really good.

"Allison. Hey." He breathed, temporarily forgetting the matter at hand.

"So, nobody knows her. Great." Diego huffed.

Luther furrowed his eyebrows. "If you're not with the coroner then why are you here? did you know dad?"

She smirked, "Bingo."

"So what, you were a friend of dads or something?" Allison pressed, looking for clarification. She wasn't _as_ worried about the mystery woman as the boys seemed to be because honestly if she was a here to pose as a threat she wouldn't be wearing heels, and that was something Allison knew for a fact.

Klaus actually cackled at that. "Daddy dearest didn't have friends."

Her eyes narrowed ever so slightly. "Something like that. This _is_ his funeral, right?"

Diego stepped closer, analysing her for anything to indicate she might be trouble for them. Interestingly, the only odd aspect of her he discovered was that she was in his eyes… literally perfect. Too perfect. Nothing was out of place; no rouge strands of hair, no smudges to her make-up, not even really a stupid crinkle on her clothes. He found that sitting with him strangely and couldn't quite work out why. As he stared at her she held her ground, staring right back at him coolly, radiating what he could only identify as confidence; but she was too stiff to be all that confident, like a deer caught in headlights. Something he could only detect thanks to his experience working in the police force.

"You know I hate to agree with Klaus, but dad didn't seem like the type to have friends." He drawled, not quite able to picture this woman as a friend of their dads.

She let her eyes trail town Diego's outfit, landing on his knives then trailing back up to his face with a newfound recognition. "Diego, right?"

"Guess dad did talk about us after all. Well, welcome to the party." Diego snorted, losing interest by the second and just wanting this day to be over and done with; weird intruder or not.

Luther's head was already spinning in a million different directions, stemming conclusions that she might have had a part in their father's death; she was suspicious after all. "What did you want with the autopsy?"

"The same thing you did."

"What in the world is going on?!" Pogo's voice rang as the hobbled into the room, peering through his spectacles at the scene; eyes locking on the girl which rooted him to the spot with the same initial surprise the rest of them had experienced upon seeing her. Though this time the woman began fidgeting the longer he surveyed her.

Vanya also timidly followed Pogo out from the lounge, nervously glancing around them all and frowning at the woman who seemed… kind of familiar. Vanya could have sworn she knew that face but couldn't place it.

"Dad's got actual friends. Didn't you know either? So, you like never caught them having afternoon tea and plotting world domination together? Seems like a dad kind of pass time." Klaus sniggered, sauntering his way past them out the front door. Distantly they heard him starting to chat idly to himself, clearly bored with the redhead. Klaus currently had his mind set on selling all the goods he'd just stolen from their dad's office and using the money to buy drugs.

Pogo knotted his eyebrows together, staring at the mysterious girl who stared right back at him with some kind of challenge commencing between the two that the other siblings were unaware of. Then Pogo gave in and sighed. "I do apologise for the welcome you received. If you'd like to accompany me upstairs, we may talk in private. If of course the rest of you would be kind enough to excuse us."

The woman's eyes darted from Pogo to the front door. "I don't know. I'm not sure I'm the most welcome here. Besides I only came for a quick stop, had to see if the old man was really gone."

"Nonsense. My age must be catching up with me, admittedly I didn't recognise you at first, but I assure you that you are in fact most welcome here."

She folded her arms. "Seems like a family event, I wouldn't want to be intruding or anything."

His eyes softened. "Sir Reginald would have wanted you to stay."

"Uh, hello, yeah who is this?" Diego asked impatiently. "She was stealing the autopsy and who let her in anyway?"

"Diego." Allison hissed at his rude tone "She knew dad. Stop it and let her breathe." She scolded then smiled at the new girl "Sorry, you have to understand we're all just a little on edge today. Please, don't feel like you need to leave. If dad would've wanted you here then… you should stay."

The redhead cocked her head to the side contemplating Allison's words then nodded and faced Diego "Nobody answered when I knocked, and the door was left unlocked. And aright fine I'm sorry I took the autopsy for two minutes, guess I let the shock cloud my better judgement."

That seemed to sit right with Diego who finally backed down with a satisfied nod.

Pogo smiled, "Well, I do believe we have some things to discuss?"

She shrugged a little nervously now. "I suppose so."

"Why can't we listen?" Luther asked, crossing his arms childishly about the fact he wasn't going to be privy to their conversation.

"Because I stated it was a private conversation, Master Luther" Pogo retorted, surprising them slightly with how severe he suddenly sounded.

"Pogo we don't even know this girl you can't just go upstairs with her. She was stealing the autopsy report!" Luther protested with a quick gesture of his hand in her direction.

"Borrowing" She muttered.

Diego snorted, "It's a _girl_ Luther not a monster under your bed." He taunted, walking towards the lounge now that he'd deemed her not a threat "Let me know when we're actually going do this thing. Or if autopsy thief over there needs to be dealt with."

Pogo grimaced at the brothers then nodded his head towards the stairs. "If you'd follow me, right this way. Fret not Master Luther I am well aware of who this is."

With that, the stranger smiled shyly at them before trotting after Pogo up the stairs to talk in private somewhere.

"That was weird, right?" Luther asked and they all nodded.

* * *

***FLASHBACK***

_Grace, their mother had slipped inside their fathers' study to alert him of their request to wish him goodnight._

"_Let's place bets. I bet he won't let us in." Klaus announced tiredly from where he was sat on the coffee table waiting._

_Ben shoved him lightly. "Have a little faith."_

"_I'll take that bet." Levi chirped in with faux merriness, also not entirely seeing the point of this whole endeavour either considering their dad had never been one for mushy little moments that normal families had. Even saying a simple goodnight would be abnormal in this household. Nevertheless, he played along._

"_Of course, you would," Luther said, rolling his eyes._

_Diego furrowed his eyebrows. "Looks like somebody needs to hit the hay, getting a bit grouchy over there?"_

"_No fighting." Allison snapped them before Luther could retaliate, straightening her pyjama top into perfection and cancelling out any creases. "If mom opens the doors and dad sees us fighting then what's the point of trying?"_

"_She's right." Ben piped up._

_The door slid back open to reveal their mom standing aside to let them inside. They all smiled their best smiles and dared to go to the line of the doorway to wait expectantly. Even Klaus had cut to the front to lean back against the doorframe with a sort of hopeful glint to his eyes. Vanya held back, frowning into the office doubtfully._

_Their smiles fell short, watching their father continue writing in his journal and ignoring their presence entirely. Nothing new there. Allison stood in the middle with imaginary steam bursting from her ears, she was angry enough that she considered rumouring their dad into saying goodnight._

"_Okay! Time for bed now, kids. Come along now." Their mother decided, shooing them all out when she realised Reginald wasn't going to cooperate. "Come along now." She repeated which made them all file out to head towards their rooms disheartened. All except for Allison who stood glaring at their father. Levi stopped to wait for her with a disappointed frown as well. "Come along now, Allison, your father's busy," Grace said, clutching Allison's arms to move her along._

"_He's always busy," Allison stated resentfully and turned to follow the others._

_Levi hated seeing his sister upset. Without thinking he skipped past Allison and Grace into the study and crossed the line through the doorway, putting on a bright smile and holding his hands behind his back._

"_Levi-" Grace began but got cut off._

"_Night dad! Just can't wait to see you tomorrow." Levi proclaimed sarcastically and waltzed away, missing Sir Reginald glancing up ever so slightly from his work._

"_Levi, come along! Your father is busy." Grace told him in a scolding tone._

"_Sorry, mom." He said and took Allison's hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze as she smiled knowingly at him. "Come on Ally, let's go."_

.

_Later that night Levi crept down from his bedroom, bare feet padding down the corridor as he rubbed at his eyes trying to rid the chills coursing through his body. He'd awoken sweating and shaking from a reoccurring nightmare he kept having. This time it had felt real, real enough to spook him into searching for reassurance. That search led him downstairs onto the landing where he knew mom always went to sleep…. or to recharge as dad repeatedly corrected him. Her recharging station wasn't anything special, just a chair in a hallway._

_As he approached her, he noticed that she was sat inhumanly still on the round chair, cables in her ears sending blue rays through what appeared to be her veins but was more likely the wires inside her. It was easy to forget mom wasn't like him, she was a robot or something which was cool. It was still a slightly chilling sight._

_Unsurely he went and sat beside her, contemplating saying something and interrupting her from recharging, but he wasn't sure whether that was a sensible idea or not. In the end, he just curled up on the chair hugging his knees to his chest. Dad would yell at him if he found out he was out of bed. But he was already scared so he chose to stay and chance it for a while. There was something comforting about being in his mom's presence, even if she wasn't moving in the slightest._

_Though, maybe he should have woken up one of the others instead…_

_After a few seconds of sitting, he heard the cables buzz as they retracted from Grace's ears and she jolted back into motion, turning her head and smiling at him. _

"_Levi dear, it's nearly 3 am why are up so late? Your father won't be happy to find you down here." She chided light-heartedly._

_He clutched his legs closer to his chest. "I got stuck." He murmured into his knees._

"_Whatever do you mean?"_

"_I had a bad dream. I turned into somebody and couldn't turn back. You all didn't believe me and wouldn't let me come home." He explained with a small snivel, turning his head to let his cheek rest on his knees as he stared pleadingly up at her for reassurance._

_Her expression softened and she glanced around before wrapping an arm over his shoulder comfortingly. "You know your father would never allow you to get stuck in a different form and nobody would ever shut you out of the house. This gift you have is something you shouldn't fear but embrace. Besides, you've never gotten stuck before."_

"_I guess."_

"_Come on now, back to bed with you." She tried ushering but he shook his head._

"_I'm scared, mom. I don't like having nightmares."_

"_Now, now Levi, nobody likes having nightmares. But they're just bad dreams. Everybody has them and they can't hurt you." She assured him._

"_Do you have bad dreams?"_

_She hesitated for a moment. "Well if I did, I'd always wake up here amongst all my wonderful views." She gestured to the clutter of paintings on the walls. "Like you wake up to all your wonderful siblings."_

"_The paintings?" he observed, glancing over them for what felt like the first time. There were views of meadows, of old England, waterfalls, people and so much more._

"_Yes, aren't they beautiful?"_

_Levi hummed, uncurling himself slightly to examine them. "Yeah. They are. Did you paint them?"_

_She tittered at him. "No, I did not. Your father collected them over the many years of his extraordinary adventures."_

"_Oh. Well, do you have a favourite?"_

_She thought about it, glancing over the paintings until her eyes locked on one specific. "Yes, I believe I do. Do you see the painting of the lady sat on the sofa up there? She must live in such a wonderful world."_

_Levi stared up at the woman his mom pointed out, finding her staring right back at him. A painted person on canvas. Something seemed to click inside of him that he was just a canvas and was able to paint himself into a different person. Whatever person he created he could also fantasise to some extent the world that they lived in, be it a wonderful world or not. He was technically an artist in a way. The artist was in control of the painting and its outcome; that thought comforted him slightly. Then his gaze lazily roamed over the other paintings, landing on another._

"_My favourite is the lady with red hair." He decided, pointing to a woman in a painting closer to the ground. The woman was staring with a sort of smugness about her, power radiating from her pose. She must have been important to the artist. "She doesn't look like she's scared of anything."_

"_Yes, I like that one too." His mother agreed "Perhaps you'd like some paintings in your room to wake up to-"_

"_Number Eight." The voice of Reginald Hargreeves interrupted, sending a pang of fear through him as he whipped around to find his dad stood holding a collection of wires in his hand. "This sort of behaviour shan't be tolerated, to bed with you. Your misconduct is trying my patience tonight."_

_He scowled childishly. "I had a nightmare."_

"_A nightmare? At your age and position in the Umbrella Academy, you should not be scared of meagre dreams anymore. Likewise, you are well aware of the rules in this house-"_

"_I was just about to escort Levi back to his room," Grace interjected, standing and offering Levi her hand which he took quickly, cowering slightly now sensing his dad's anger building. He clung to Grace's arm tightly, feeling a sense of security once more. "Come along now like your father said it's far past your bedtime."_

_Quickly they both slipped away from Reginald and up to Levi's room where Grace tucked him back into bed. He didn't think to wonder why his dad had been up to or why he had been holding wires leading into each of their rooms. _

"_Thanks, mom."_

_She smiled and brushed his hair from his face then clicked off the light. "No more worrying about silly dreams. There's nothing to be scared about and I'll always be here for you when you wake up."_

"_I'll try. I'll be like the lady with red hair." He murmured sleepily, rolling over._

* * *

***Present time***

About thirty minutes later they had all gathered in the living room in thick silence, barely looking at one another. Klaus, having recently returned from his drug endeavour, rolled his eyes and got up to get a drink, not sure how many he'd even had today. Of course, Ben was muttering something about this being his fourth, but he just ignored him and began rooting through the bar.

Pogo came wandering back in with the redhead trailing behind him. He kept shooting her a few exasperated glances but apart from that things seemed fine.

"Everyone I apologise for the somewhat confusing arrival of our guest, but I do believe an introduction is in order." He told them, turning to the girl and gesturing encouragingly for her to go ahead with introductions. Everyone glanced over, most with impassive thoughts about her considering they'd rather be elsewhere or be getting on with the funeral.

She stepped forward and opened her mouth but then a flash of panic crossed her face as some internal conflict happen which only Vanya seemed to notice before it was corrected into a picture of ease. Vanya rose an eyebrow but chose not to comment.

"You can just call me Lilith." She introduced quickly, receiving a disappointed glare from Pogo. "Pogo asked me to stay for the funeral…"

Diego shrugged, "Whatever."

Klaus from the bar rose a bottle of alcohol in the air. "Hey, I say the more the merrier."

Pogo gave Lilith a pointed look, then shook his head and turned to leave "When you are all done with your nonsense, we shall perhaps be able to give your father a funeral at some point today." He said and began shuffling out from the room.

The redhead now identified as Lilith narrowed her eyes after the ape. "You asked me to stay."

"Then act like you want to." Pogo retorted which once again surprised the others with the tone he took.

That left an awkward Lilith in their company and Pogo was right to some extent, she didn't really look like she wanted to be here after whatever she and Pogo had discussed but none of them chose to question that. Because honestly did any of them really want to be here? They all briefly muttered their names to her before once again silence fell over them.

It was a miserable atmosphere, to say the least. Lilith had casually busied herself wandering by all the photographs and perusing, mirroring what Vanya had been doing earlier. The rest sat in their own bubbles of glumness.

Luther cleared his throat and stood up. "Um, I guess Pogo's right, we should get this started. So, I figured we could have a sort of memorial service, in the courtyard at sundown. Say a few words, at dads favourite spot." Luther proposed to them all as they sat on the couches and as Klaus busied himself in the background concocting some kind of alcoholic beverage.

Allison furrowed her eyebrows. "Dad had a favourite spot?"

"Yeah, you know, under the old oak tree. We used to sit out there all the time. None of you ever did that?"

Klaus came gliding back over to the seats with a drink, a cigarette and some kind of trophy he'd picked up all in hand. "Will there be refreshments? Tea? Scones? Cucumber sandwiches are always a winner."

"What? No. And put that out. You know Dad didn't allow smoking in here." Luther ordered but Klaus ignored him and instead set the trophy down on the end table beside the antique sofa.

Allison scanned Klaus for a second before asking. "Is that my skirt?"

"What? Oh! Yeah, this. I found it in your room. It's a little dated, I know, but it's very breathey on the…. bits." He explained, posing for them all to see his leather skirt and making her smirk ever so slightly and for Lilith's lips to twitch in amusement.

"The Oaktree sounds like a nice place to do it," Lilith said supportively to Luther, dragging the subject back to the funeral and walking over to seat herself besides Vanya, making a feeble attempt to join in.

Luther nodded gratefully at her. "Thank you. Now listen up, still some important things that we need to discuss, all right?"

"Like what?" Diego countered.

"Like the way he died."

"And here we go," Diego muttered, suppressing the urge to roll his eyes. "You sure you wanna do this right now, in front of her?" he argued instead, pointing at Lilith.

"Maybe she knows something." Luther justified which had Lilith glaring at him.

"I don't understand. I thought they said it was a heart attack." Vanya replied, confused.

Luther blinked slowly in frustration. "Yeah, according to the coroner."

"Well, wouldn't they know?"

"Theoretically."

"Theoretically?"

"Look just saying, at the very least, something happened," Luther argued his case. "The last time I talked to dad, he sounded strange."

Klaus flopped himself down besides Lilith who huffed and tensed at being in the middle but budged up for him regardless. Klaus then took a mouthful of the dark bourbon and gurgled around it the words, "Oh, Quelle surprise!"

"Strange how?" Allison pressed.

"He sounded on edge. Told me I should be careful who to trust." Luther revealed to them.

Diego got up from his chair "Luther, he was a paranoid, bitter old man who was starting to lose what was left of his marbles."

"No. He must have known something was going to happen." Luther stated surely then cast Klaus a pleading glance. "Look, I know you don't like to do it, but I need you to talk to Dad."

Klaus pointed to his chest and rose both eyebrows while Allison scoffed. Then he rolled his eyes realising Luther was being quite serious and began protesting, "I can't just call Dad in the afterlife and be like, Dad, could you just stop playing tennis with Hitler for a moment and take a quick call?"

"Since when? That's your thing." Luther snapped back.

"I'm not in the right… frame of mind."

"You're high?" Allison translated, despondently doubting they'd be getting Klaus to be of any sort of help.

He laughed gleefully, "Yeah! Yeah! I mean how are you not, listening to this nonsense?"

Lilith shot Klaus a disappointed glance and Diego couldn't help but notice her picture of perfection crack faintly as concern practically bled from her. "Really?"

"If you're looking for the golden child of the bunch, I'm about as far on the opposite end of the whole spectrum from being it darling," Klaus told her and took another big gulp from the drink in his hand that was becoming rapidly emptier.

"Why did you start?"

"Why not!" he countered with joy.

"Well, sober up, this is important. Then there's the issue of the missing monocle." Luther continued.

"Who gives a shit about a stupid monocle?" Diego retorted, clearly losing his patience now.

"Exactly, it's worthless. Whoever took it, I think it was personal. Someone close to him. Someone with a grudge." He explained.

"Where are you going with this?" Klaus demanded.

"Oh, isn't it obvious Klaus?" Diego replied for Luther. "He thinks one of us killed Dad." He stated and Luther's lips thinned, eyes darting to the sidelines which essentially confirmed Diego's statement for them.

"You do?"

"How could you think that?"

Diego relished in the fact that everybody was now turning against Luther. "Great job, Luther. Way to lead."

Lilith sniggered which made Luther scowl as she rose to her feet elegantly, away from being trapped between Klaus and Vanya. "Why am I not surprised that none of you have changed in the slightest. Isn't this supposed to be a funeral not a game of Cluedo?" she asked snidely and plucked the bourbon glass from Klaus' fingers.

He made somewhat pathetic grabby hands at her to get it back, failing at doing so. "Hey, I was drinking that."

She twirled back around and smirked at Luther challengingly. "Alright fine, let's play. I love games anyway so let's do a good ole _game of detectives_."

"This isn't a game." He responded warningly, taken aback by the woman's outburst.

She rose an eyebrow and continued anyway, pointing to Allison first. "She's an actress, with photos likely proving her whereabouts during the scene of the supposed crime which would mean she wasn't even in the country. Klaus, well he's just got out of rehab judging from the band on his wrist and would only end up seeing your dad in the afterlife anyway. Those two aren't suspects. Vanya doesn't look like she could hurt a fly if she tried. Diego? Hm, the most likely to have done it, right? I mean look at him he's still wearing his gear."

"Why do you get a say in this again?" Diego growled, crossing his arms.

"-He's the one arguing with you about it… but he also said earlier he already searched the 'crime' scene and checked the autopsy implying he was also investigating the death. While that's arguably suspicious I seriously doubt it was him. Hasn't he been a cop or something for the past few years? That leaves… oh, you Luther." She said sweetly, taking confident a step towards him. "Where were you?"

Luther actually spluttered in surprise at her which made Diego snort and try to stifle a laugh. "What? Don't be ridiculous I was on the moon doing official academy business for dad."

"See, that didn't feel so good, did it? Being accused of murder. I'm sure your siblings didn't appreciate the accusation either." She said coolly, rendering him speechless.

Klaus began clapping slowly. "And where has she been all our lives?"

"How did you know I was a cop?" Diego suddenly asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

"Ex-cop." Allison corrected and Diego glared at her. Allison didn't ask how the woman knew she lived out of the country…it was known that Allison lived in LA publicly because of her celebrity status but it was still a bit strange how much this woman knew about them all.

That seemed to briefly catch Lilith off guard until she eventually shrugged. "Reginald must have mentioned it."

Allison crossed her arms with rising suspicion. "Judging by that whole deduction you just made then dad must have mentioned a lot about us."

"And what about you then, where were you?" Luther shot back. "It's not like any of us know you."

She just deadpanned him. "Seriously?"

"You're crazy, man. You're crazy." Klaus told Luther as everyone was getting up to leave.

"I'm not finished." He called after them as they began walking from the room.

"Oh, sorry, I'm just gonna go murder mom. Be right back." Klaus replied over his shoulder.

Luther pinched the brim of his nose then accusingly glared at Lilith. "That wasn't helpful."

She shrugged and handed him the glass of bourbon. "Lighten up, it's a funeral after all." She muttered with a bite of sarcasm to her tone and left the room with the others.

"That went well." Luther sighed to himself once alone.

* * *

_**17 years ago…**_

_Alarms could be heard blaring from the inside of the bank, alongside the hum of people worriedly chatting and gossiping from the outside the front door as news-reporters and crowds gathered. All of them were trying to get some kind idea of what was going on. Around back a smaller group assembled._

"_Alright, everybody remembers the plan? Allison goes in first and I'll then-'_

_Diego rolled his eyes "Yes we all remember your plan. You've only said it about fifteen times t-today."_

"_Can we not argue on our first mission?" Ben requested, tapping his fingers together anxiously as they all stood around the back of the bank that was currently being robbed._

"_Well, either way, don't forget what dad said, take care of the bad guys then we have to go outside and reveal ourselves to the world," Luther instructed, letting their fathers' instructions roll around in his head on repeat._

_Klaus frowned, "And what part do I play in this so-called plan, you still haven't said what I do!"_

"_Uh… watch the back door?" Luther offered, wondering why Klaus was here in the first place and not stood elsewhere to wait with Vanya and Reginald. He wasn't really sure what help Klaus was going to be..._

_Ben took pity on a deflating Klaus. "Or he could come in round back with us?"_

_Levi lit up and waggled his eyebrows at Klaus. "Want to be my hostage?"_

_Klaus grinned. "Thought you'd never ask."_

"_Alright, Alright, come on, come on!" Allison hurried them._

"_Yes, I would like to get in there before they rob the bank." Five commented sarcastically._

_Before they could all head on to their designated positions Levi thrust his hand outwards and held it in front of them expectantly. They all stared at him with raised eyebrows._

"_What? We're the Umbrella Academy have some team spirit!" He scolded them playfully and they all rolled their eyes but began putting their hands on top of his until they were all joined in the middle of the circle they'd created. "Here's to the beginning of the Umbrella Academy!"_

"_Let's do this!" Diego grinned and they all threw their hands up in the air with a cheer, proceeding to run off to their starting positions. _

_Levi, Ben, Klaus, and Diego stayed around back, slipping through the backdoor to take care of any robbers back there. As they advanced through the corridors, they heard voices around the corner._

_Diego held up a hand to stop them "T-There's three." He informed them, counting the voices and mentally kicking himself for the stutter._

"_You heard the boss; we stay put and watch the back in case any coppers come in this way so go back to your post." One of the voices snapped._

"_But it's boring back here. Can't we get into the action and help raid the place?"_

"_No, unless you want me to tell the boss you fucked up and let all the cops in." the first voice growled. "Jesus, I knew we shouldn't have gone to _Nez Café _for pie first now we're fucked for time."_

"_Who gets pie at a café," Levi whispered judgmentally and Diego shushed him to be quiet._

"_Do your thing," Ben whispered to Diego who nodded and pulled out a knife, throwing it around the corner and they all heard a started shriek as one of the men collapsed onto the ground. _

"_What the hell?!" The voices shouted in alarm, panicked footsteps sounding. "Where did that even come from?"_

"_Who's there!? You check left I'll go right. Jerry stays put."_

_Footsteps started coming towards them and Diego flashed a smirk to Ben. "Your turn." He said and Ben rolled his eyes, allowing a tentacle to come from him and slowly slither along the floor. _

_A burly man rounded the corner and froze, seeing all four children grin and wave up at him cheerfully._

"_What the-" He began but the tentacle grabbed his leg and tugged him downwards, throwing him into the wall and knocking him out. Levi promptly gave Ben a high-five, Ben cringing as the tentacle retracted. _

"_Hey? Hey Dean, you ok? What was that?" the other voice called out._

_Levi sighed and cracked his knuckles, without hesitation morphing into the knocked-out burglar and grabbing his dropped gun, winking at Klaus before putting him in a headlock and dragging him around the corner to face the remaining men._

"_Yeah, this one snuck up on me that's all," Levi said, voices ten octaves deeper to match the other man's voice. Klaus put on a pretty convincing act, tugging against Levi but not enough to actually break free._

"_Get off me asshole!" Klaus yelled, acting the victim at his very finest._

"_A kid?" The man scoffed, putting his gun away again then kneeling down by the man on the ground to examine the knife in his thigh. "Put him with the other hostages."_

_Levi smirked, making to walk past the man but stopping behind him and morphing back into himself, releasing Klaus and leaning beside the robber's ear. "Sure thing." He snickered as the man whirled around and blinked in confusion. He wasn't given the opportunity to react any further as Levi sent the butt of the gun straight down onto his head, knocking him unconscious. After that Levi dropped the gun with a disapproving hiss._

"_Gee you could have loosened your grip a bit," Klaus complained, rubbing his neck._

"_You were swearing, tut, tut." He retorted with a cheeky grin that made Klaus swat him._

_"Hey, don't fucking move!" The man on the ground had his gun out, pointing it between Klaus and Levi who held up his hands in faux defeat. Another knife came whizzing around the corner, the blunt end hitting the man's head and knocking him out._

"_Come on, let's catch up with the others before we miss everything!" Diego exclaimed, sprinting wildly ahead._

_._

_Allison skipped into the bank with her hands behind her back, coming to a stop beside one of the robbers with a relaxed attitude. He turned to her in surprise._

"_Hey, get back with the others!" He snapped at her, gesturing to the quivering hostages with his gun._

_She looked him up and down. "I heard a rumour…"_

"_What? What did you say?" The man asked, leaning down to hear her better._

_She smirked and cupped her mouth. "I heard a rumour… that you shot your friend in the foot." _

_The robber's eyes glazed over white, then he proceeded to raise his gun and shoot his fellow robber in the foot like Allison had rumoured him to do. The other robber yelped and went down instantly, clutching his foot in pain._

_Not giving Allison's robber a chance to wonder what just happened, Luther dropped through the roof windowpane and took out another robber that he'd landed on, lifting him up and slamming his head against the counter to be sure he was unconscious, then throwing him upwards out one of the top windows._

_Diego came charging through the back doors. "Guns are for sissies. Real men throw knives!" He declared the line he'd been rehearsing for three days now and threw two knives towards Allison and the shell-shocked robber, twisting them sideways and directing it towards one of the other robbers. Both knives impaled the centre of his chest._

_Shortly after that Levi, Ben, and Klaus entered the scene, pushing through the doors that Diego had come through. One of the robbers who'd been watching in minor surprise shook himself back into action and grabbed Levi's arm tightly. Levi glared up at the man and quickly morphed his face into a lion which almost made the guy let go._

"_What the hell is wrong with you kids-"_

_SMASH_

_The robber went limp as Klaus smashed a vase over his head and snorted at the body. Ben rose his eyebrows and sent a reassuring kick to the man's head just to be sure. Levi nodded his thanks and raced further into the scene, morphing into a robber that was making a beeline for the door._

"_Whoa what the hell!" Levi exclaimed, watching the man he was mimicking stop dead in his tracks, horrified upon seeing Levi disguised as him. Levi cocked his head in faux confusion._

"_What-?" The real robber gawked, making to grab his gun but finding it missing. From the sidelines, Levi saw Five appear holding a gun, winking at him then disappearing again._

"_Gary? Gary, what the fuck?" The man who was moving away from Allison pointed his gun at the two identical robbers, shifting it between them both being unsure who the real robber was. Well, now Levi had a name for the robber he was pretending to be…_

"_Shoot him! Th-that's not me! Shoot him and the other kids!" The real robber exclaimed in panic._

"_No, shoot him! It's me, Gary!" Levi countered with the same voice. "These kids are crazy- one of them turned into me!" He exclaimed as his siblings watched the show in amusement, Luther standing in front of the hostages to protect them._

"_Boss I'm the real Gary just shoot this little shit down!" _

_Levi sent the boss man a pretty convincing worried expression. "Wh-what? No, please, I'm the real Gary! Come on man, you know me!"_

"_No don't listen to him!" The real robber growled. "He's chatting shit!"_

_Levi took a risky move and stepped closer to the boss robber. "Man, please, they already got our friends! Heck, we were having pie at...God, what was it... Nez Café! We were there earlier- is that enough proof?"_

"_Wait- no- I knew that- I- NO-!"_

_BANG_

_The real robber fell to the ground, blood beginning to pool from his stomach_ onto _the marble flooring. Levi folded his arms and cringed, morphing back into himself and examining the body on the ground._

"_Ouch." He commented smugly, rolling his wrists slightly to rid the strain of shapeshifting from the muscles there. "You just shot him because of some pie."_

_The man went to shoot Levi, but a knife hit his gun which diverted its aim towards the ground beside Levi, the bullet scuffing the concrete and leaving a dent. _

"_That's wasn't very nice." Allison giggled._

_He panicked and backed away, climbing up onto the cashier counter as all the children advanced closer to him so he pointed his gun at them all. "Get back you freaks!"_

"_Hey, be careful up there, buddy," Diego warned him as the kids snickered at one another._

"_Yeah, wouldn't want you to get hurt," Allison added._

"_Get back now!" _

_Five flashed into the scene sitting cross-legged behind the man on the counter with a smirk. "Or what?" He challenged then disappeared as quick as he arrived, the man shooting the spot he'd been sat in several times. A whoosh sounded and Five reappeared stood with his arms crossed behind the man again. The man swung around and began attempting to shoot Five once more, finding a stapler in his hands instead of a gun._

"_Oh, that's one badass stapler!" Five mocked before slamming the stapler upwards into the man's skull and knocking him out._

_Five jumped down from the counter and they regrouped, Klaus clapping at their success. "Clear here." Five announced._

"_We need the whole building clear" Luther reminded them, gesturing to the vaults that had multiple shadows moving against the fogged glass. Then everybody turned to face ben who paled._

"_Really?" Ben groaned, reluctantly shuffling towards the vault door. "Do we really have to do this?" He asked nervously._

_Luther stared down at the shorter boy condescendingly. "Come on Ben, there's more guys in the vault." _

_Levi took pity on him and gave him a supportive thumbs up. "You got this!"_

_Ben sighed and stopped with his hand on the door handle. "I didn't sign up for this." He told them then slipped inside, seconds later chilling screeches sounded along with squelches as a silhouette of tentacles began slamming around the room. _

_The hostages screamed in terror and fled from the bank after witnessing Bens power. They couldn't fault them; it was mildly horrifying watching Ben's power even with the fogged glass censoring it._

_A body was thrown up against the glass, cracking a spider-web shape over it and staining it with blood._

_Klaus winced, "Benny boy's going all out, huh."_

"_Yep. Gonna puke." Levi muttered, facing away as more blood splattered across the glass._

"_Woos." Diego teased, not facing away._

_Then everything went silent and Ben remerged, coated head to toe in thick blood. He sighed heavily, gathering himself for a moment before saying, "Can we go home now?"_

"_Time for the grand reveal!" Allison told them giddily, staring excitedly at the exit where the hostages had left._

_Levi cringed, taking a handkerchief from his pocket. "You got a little…" He pointed to his own body as Ben took the handkerchief and began wiping the blood from his face. "Yeah."_

"_Ok, nobody forgets what mom told us, chins up and shoulders straight." Diego rehearsed, straightening himself up and practically skipping towards the front doors, Luther scuttling after him to go first. _

_They all began following except for Ben who held back slightly, Levi frowned, "Hey, you ok?"_

_Ben's lip pouted, "What if they don't like me? I look gross!"_

"_Oh..."_

_After a second of contemplation, he shifted his appearance to coat his entire body with what appeared to be blood; copying the blood on Ben best he could over his own clothes. It was a bit difficult to copy; usually, he just copied people or animals, he never added details to himself. Obviously, it wasn't real, but it looked convincing enough to the point where it began to make even him feel a bit squeamish at the prospect of actually being soaked in blood._

_Once covered in a decent amount of 'blood' he opened his arms to admire his handy work. "There, now we're both gross." He declared with a wink, seeing Ben light up considerably. "Come on, everybody's already outside. Let's be fashionably late."_

_Ben smiled gratefully at him. "Thanks."_

_Both of them followed their siblings outside into the daylight again, signifying to the world the beginning of The Umbrella Academy._

* * *

***Present time***

"Come on now Reggie. Any time now." Klaus' voice came from the living room as Lilith walked past the lounge entrance, backtracking to peek in and see him staring at the urn, a photograph of Reginald Hargreeves himself beside it.

For a while, she stood there watching Klaus raise his arms in the air in some sort of attempt to summon the man. He even grew impatient and began talking with his bellybutton to the urn, pleading a 'please' with it and laughing at his antics.

"Just need to sober up… clear the thoughts…" Klaus decided, slapping his cheeks for a minute then raising his hands again in what he must have visualized as a summoning pose, shaking them impatiently. "Come on! Come on, chop-chop!" he urged, pointing at the urn accusingly. "you always were a stubborn old bastard!"

"Having trouble?" Lilith asked from the doorway, alerting him of her presence.

Klaus spun on his heels, startled by her voice but composing himself quick to give her an eager wave. "No… no… just bad reception in the underworld or something." He said flippantly.

"I see." She nodded, walking over to join him. "You're right though, he really was a stubborn old bastard. Is it just me or does he still look like he's about to burst into some kind of lecture here?" She asked, picking up the photograph of Reginald.

Klaus laughed, "I forgot about his god-awful lectures… I'm pretty sure I could still recite about five of them. Now I don't know about you, but with all this funeral business I think I need a drink." He decided, leaning over the bar and pushing the urn by accident with his arm, knocking it over and sending the ashes all over the counter. Klaus shot back like he'd been scolded, hands covering his mouth.

Both of them stared at the grey ashes, unsure how to react until Klaus awkwardly faced her and she couldn't contain an inappropriate giggle which gave him the all-clear sign to let out a nervous, drunken laugh. Both of them didn't seem entirely fazed by the fact they were being relatively disrespectful.

"Oops?" She offered him, seeing him glancing back to check nobody else was here.

"Oh dear, oh dear, oh dearie dear." Klaus fretted, hopping from foot to foot. "Well if he didn't want to talk before, he definitely won't want to now. At least I tried."

"…you knocked over the urn."

"…Yeah." He shot her a guilty glace.

"How many drinks have you had?" She asked teasingly.

"Uh… I don't keep count…" He replied then gazed to the side and stuck out his tongue at thin air, well, stuck out his tongue at Ben but Lilith couldn't see the currently seething ghost. "Ok, maybe I've had roughly… eight."

She smiled and shook her head. "Alright, I won't say anything If you don't have anything else to drink, sound fair?"

His face lit up. "Oh, you have just become a gem to this household. Stay as long as you want."

"I'm no snitch." She chuckled then sighed at the mess "Ok, we need a dustpan or something we can't just leave him on the counter. And you're cleaning up cause I'm not touching that."

* * *

All the Hargreeves had slumped around the house by themselves after Luther's failure of debating the cause of their dad's death. It was almost childish in a sense, Luther and Allison retreating to their rooms and rummaging through their old belongings. Allison felt drawn to an item of jewellery she hadn't touched since before she left the mansion; a heart-shaped locked with 'A+L' engraved onto it.

Klaus, after dusting the ashes back to where they belonged, carried the urn under one arm down into the kitchens. He discarded it onto the table, taking to pulling out a small baggie from his jacket pocket that contained more than a few pills. He began pouring some out onto his palm and comically snorted at the amount that fell out.

"Oh. Three? Okay!" He said to himself before throwing his head back and slapping them into his mouth. He sighed in relief as they melted on his tongue, stuffing away the packet again so he could clamber onto the table and lie down for a bit. He wasn't breaking any promises, Lilith told him no more drinking she never said no to drugs.

Diego collapsed onto the couch in the living room with a heavy sigh, closing his eyes and cracking his knuckles. To busy himself and help ease his nerves he began fiddling with a knife between his fingers. He above anyone else was more frustrated by Luther's accusations, mainly because he knew they'd probably been directed at him if anybody in this household. Diego had hated Reginald there was no denying that, but he wasn't a stone-cold killer and if that's how low Luther thought of him then well… maybe it was a mistake even coming today.

Outside the living room in the foyer, Vanya sat alone on the stairs, at the centre of the whole house staring at the front door. She ran a hand over the back of her neck with a sigh, at least nothing more had been mentioned about her autobiography, after all, she wasn't so sure she could have handled being fully confronted about it on a day like this.

Just up the stairs beside Grace's charging station, Lilith was sat staring at the collection of paintings with saddened eyes. She focused on a bare piece of the wall amongst the vast collection of paintings where one seemed to be missing. Grace wasn't around currently; probably downstairs in the kitchens. For a moment the sadness dissipated, but then it returned in a more frustrated form causing her to tsk and stand up, facing away from the paintings with crossed arms.

In his room, Luther knelt down to browse the assortment of vinyl records he'd assembled throughout the years, pulling out one in particular. He took it out of its case and set it in the record player, turning the volume up. The song '_I Think We're Alone Now'_ by Tiffany began playing, the beat drumming next door into Allison's room and travelling all the way down into the basement where Klaus and Pogo were. All of them listened to the lyrics they practically knew off by heart

'_Children behave. That's what they say when we're together. And watch how you play. They don't understand and so we're running just as fast as we can. Holding onto one another's hand.'_

Despite trying to initially ignore the temptation, all of them felt the spell of the music begin to bewitch them into getting up and start dancing along to the tune. Even if they hated this house and most of the memories attached to it, there had been good memories underneath all the horrible ones. This song somehow wriggled its way into each of them and revived some of those good memories.

'_Tryin' to get away into the night. And then you put your arms around me and we tumble to the ground and then we say, I think we're alone now.'_

Luther's dancing was old-school, he bobbed to the music and had to be careful because of his burly form, managing to hit a wooden hanging model airplane down from the ceiling. Klaus grabbed the urn as his dance partner and began swaying around the kitchen with it. Once bored with the urn he set it back down and resorted to flailing his limbs about instead. Allison grabbed a pink feather boa to twirl around her room with, jumping up onto her bed to dance at one point, shimmying her body to the music.

Diego, quietly shut the lounge doors so nobody could see him anymore because it would definitely ruin his tough-guy demeanour, plus he'd definitely have to explain how and where he learned to dance so expertly. Vanya, trying to relax, got up and began stiffly moving to the music in what could possibly pass as dancing. Even Pogo was tapping his foot along to the music down in his room. Lilith bowed her head and bit her lip to stifle a smile.

'_I think we're alone now. There doesn't seem to be anyone around. The beating of our hearts is the only sound' _

Eventually, Lilith gave in as well and let out a small chuckle, unable to resist kicking off her heels to dance around the landing in front of all the paintings. There was a certain carelessness to the way she danced which contrasted her formal get up, but she melted right into the music just like everybody else had. Though anybody watching would probably think she was drunk due to her dance style; arms half in the air and eyes closed.

The blissful moment was ruined as thunder roared to life outside, short-circuiting the power instantly and cutting the music with it. The rooms shook slightly, metal objects began sliding towards the walls, drawn by some kind of force. Klaus barely caught the urn as it slid across the table. The source of all the destruction was hinted by a blue glow coming through the windows facing the courtyard, exactly where they'd planned to hold their father's funeral.

Outside in the courtyard, the wind howled and lightning flashed startling Diego who was the first out as the rest of them raced to investigate as well. There seemed to be some kind of blue energy source swirling in front of Bens statue, potentially causing the bizarre weather change.

"What is it?" Vanya panicked as everyone filed out.

"Don't get too close!" Allison warned, none of them able to take their eyes off whatever the temporal anomaly lookalike was. Allison instinctively found herself behind Luther.

"Yeah, no shit." Diego snarked back just as Lilith came bounding out the house as well, gaping in alarm.

"That belong to any of you?" She asked in confusion, walking forward to join them in accessing it from a relatively safe distance.

Luther deadpanned her. "Of course it doesn't! Looks like some sort of temporal anomaly. Either that or a miniature black hole. One of the two." He deducted.

"Pretty big difference there, Paul Bunyan." Diego snarked back.

"And we're just _standing_ here calmly looking at a potential black hole because…?" She shot back, eying the door back inside like it was a lifeline.

From that door came Klaus, sprinting outside with a fire extinguisher in hand. "Out of the way!" He yelled, bursting past them towards the temporal anomaly.

"What are you-" Luther began but got cut off by the sharp hiss of the fire extinguisher being used by Klaus, as if that was going to make any kind of a difference. When that didn't work Klaus chucked the fire extinguisher into the temporal anomaly, there was a sharp _zap_ as it disappeared elsewhere or got incinerated. One of the two.

"Klaus!" Lilith growled, grabbing his wrist with her gloved hand and yanking him away from the weird 'thing' that was actually becoming more translucent and stable. In fact, they'd argue they could see an image through it… was that trees?

"What is that gonna do?" Allison fired at Klaus who was now safely behind Lilith.

He shrugged, "I don't know. Do you have a better idea?"

More lightning cracked and the wind got wilder, to the point where Luther ushered everybody back a little, "Whoa, whoa, whoa" he shouted, shielding them with his arms then feeling Allison grab his hand for comfort. "Everybody get behind me."

"Yeah," Diego piped up, planting himself besides Luther. "Get behind _us_"

"I vote for running, c'mon!" Klaus called for them to follow but they all stayed rooted to the spot, so he reluctantly stayed as well.

Lilith took a few steps back towards the door. "You know running's actually not the worst plan-"

Before the whole 'running' plan could commence, electricity around the anomaly was now crackling furiously and a figure could be seen trying to push through. At least that's what they could gather was happening, so that meant this thing was maybe a portal? If so then who was trying to come through to their side…

Seconds passed of them staring dumbfoundedly up at it, then a body fell out and hit the ground with a dull thud and the portal disappeared as quick as it arrived. Everything shot back to normal then, no wind, no lightning, no thunder. Like nothing even happened. The only difference was now there was somebody lying in their courtyard.

Whoever it was didn't seem injured as they hurried to push their body up into a standing position, brushing off a few leaves from a severely oversized suit. Everybody stared in bewilderment at a boy that each of them recognised without a shadow of a doubt.

Klaus spoke first, "Does anybody else see little Number Five, or is that just me?"

Five glanced at them then down at himself, face scrunching in distaste as the situation washed over him. The equations must have been off because he certainly shouldn't be 'little' right now, in fact, he should be quite a few years older than he currently appears.

"Shit."

* * *

All of them found themselves in the basement kitchen, still trying to swallow down their shock as Five waltzed around trying to make a sandwich for himself. Most of them were seated, Klaus cross-legged on the tabletop and the rest of them on chairs except for Allison, Diego, and Lilith who remained standing.

"What's the date? The exact date." Five demanded specifically, bringing a loaf of bread over to the table.

"The 24th," Vanya responded automatically.

"Of _what_"

"March"

Five looked briefly unnerved or apprehensive by that but then gave her a nod of acknowledgement. "Good."

"So, are we gonna talk about what just happened?" Luther requested but Five stayed silent, more interested in his sandwich. Everybody glanced at one another awkwardly then Luther abruptly stood and towered over Five domineeringly. "It's been 17 years"

Five glared up at him and moved forward like he was going to co-operate with the conversation. "It's been a lot longer than that", He said then spacial jumped behind Luther onto a stool beside the cabinets so he could reach the top shelves.

Luther blinked and grit his teeth. "I haven't missed that."

"Where'd you go?" Diego questioned, sitting himself down on the edge of the tabletop with crossed arms.

"The future. It's shit, by the way." Five informed them, spacial jumping back over to his sandwich with a packet of marshmallows.

"Called it!" Klaus said immediately, raising a hand in success.

"I should've listened to the old man." Five sighed, searching in the fridge and pulling out some peanut butter. It was relatively difficult to comprehend the situation and keep up with Five's fast pace. "You know, jumping through space is one thing, jumping through time is a toss of the dice." He told them, opening the peanut butter for his sandwich and briefly glancing up at them, eying Klaus' attire. "Nice dress."

Surprised at even getting recognition, Klaus lit up and began swinging a tassel on his skirt around. "Oh, well Danke."

Vanya shook her head, trying to get the conversation back on track. "Wait, how did you get back?"

"In the end, I had to project my consciousness forward into a suspended quantum state version of myself that exists across every possible instance of time." He explained, all their eyebrows arching progressively the more he revealed.

"That makes no sense," Diego commented, staring at the ground like it would help him understand.

"Well, it would if you were smarter." Five quipped back, provoking Diego to lunge onto his feet so fast he briefly startled Klaus, getting blocked by Luther's arm that shot outwards.

"How long were you there?" Luther asked to move quickly away from a possible fight cooking with Diego's temper. That wasn't going to help them get answers any easier.

"Forty-five years. Give or take."

All their mouths fell open, Luther and Diego falling back into their seats. Even Klaus looked surprised by the statement, leaning forward on the table like he was trying to catch Five in a bluff, which of course he didn't. The irony set in that the one who appeared the youngest in this room was actually the oldest.

"So, what are you saying? That you're 58?" Luther pieced together, not quite sure whether he believed it or not.

Five's gaze shot upwards in irritation. "No, my consciousness is 58. Apparently, my body is now 13 again." He corrected like he was talking to a bunch of pre-schoolers.

Vanya closed her eyes momentarily. "Wait, how does that even work?"

Sandwich prepared Five turned away, contemplating something to himself. "Delores kept saying the equations were off. Eh." He shrugged and took a bite of his sandwich, facing them once again. "Bet she's laughing now."

"Delores?" Vanya pried but he ignored her and glanced over them once again, having to do a double-take on Lilith.

"Huh." He breathed, staring at Lilith with a fond glint in his eyes that the others hadn't received. "I wasn't so sure I'd actually see you here."

They glanced back at Lilith who was leaning against the doorway.

"Wait you know her?" Diego blurted.

If Five wasn't looking at them all like they were idiots before he certainly was now. "Obviously."

"How is that even possible, you knew one of dads friends and we didn't?" Luther exclaimed in utter disbelief.

"What?"

"Dad's friend." Allison reiterated, gesturing to Lilith who put on a very stiff smile and half waved. "Lilith"

For a brief moment he faltered in eating the sandwich, then bemusement spread across Five's face. "Lilith?" he parroted, whatever joke he was finding in that falling short at her serious expression. "Right. Well, can _Lilith_ not speak for herself?"

She glared, "I can."

Five tilted his head like he didn't believe her then went back to eating his sandwich, picking up a newspaper on the table that read the headline, 'CITY SAYS GOODBYE TO REGINALD HARGREEVES'.

"Guess I missed the funeral." He commented idly, chucking the newspaper back down.

"How'd you know about that?" Luther asked.

Five scowled, irritated by the question he clearly thought was stupid. "What part of the future do you not understand?" he snarked back and Luther had to clench his jaw in frustration.

"And he did just pick up the newspaper," Lilith added wittily earning herself a glare.

Five analysed the picture of Reginald on the newspaper and glossed over the columns. "Heart failure huh?"

"Yeah."

"No."

Five hummed at Diego and Luther's disagreement. "Nice to see nothing's changed." He stated then began walking from the room, wordlessly declaring the end of that conversation

They all watched him leave, processing his arrival still. Allison stared after Five in confusion. "Uh, that's it? That's all you have to say?"

Five brushed past Lilith and out of the room, calling back over his shoulder. "What else is there to say? The circle of life."

The rest of them stayed in the kitchen digesting Five's words, trying to string together all the information that had just been dumped on them.

"Well…" Luther interrupted their thoughts. "That was interesting."

* * *

Later Vanya found Five alone in the living room, staring up at the portrait of himself their father had hung up a week after he'd disappeared. It was odd seeing Five in the flesh beside the painting which had been his replacement for so long. He was even dressed in his old uniform, probably the only thing here that would fit him anymore.

Without looking back Five knew she was there. "Nice to know Dad didn't forget me." He said, turning with a grim expression. "Like some." He added bitterly.

Vanya nodded sadly, "And we thought the numbers were his favouriting system."

"Well, Levi is Eight so… maybe it is a favouriting system," Five shrugged, giving her a sarcastic smirk. "It's obviously not a power rating, I'd be number one if that were true."

Vanya huffed out a laugh. "Of course."

"Read your book, by the way." He informed her, watching her face fall instantly as anxiety clouded her mind. Seeing the panic in her eyes Five glanced upwards at the ceiling like it was more interesting. "Found it in a library that was still standing. I thought it was pretty good, all things considered. Yeah, definitely ballsy. Giving up the family secrets. Sure that went over well."

He moved away from Vanya, she wasn't sure if he was angry at her like everybody else or not. Five seemed almost impassive about it if anything, like it didn't affect him, but he could see how it had affected the rest of the family. Either way, he'd still given the best reaction so far.

"They hate me." She confessed, but that was probably obvious already. It had been their whole lives.

Five's eyes went distant. "Oh, there are worse things that can happen."

"You mean like what happened to Ben?"

His nostrils flared a few times. "Was it bad?"

Vanya could only nod, driving them into silence at the memory of their brother. The sweetest of them probably, the one who deserved what happened to him the least. Yet life seemed to work in cruel and unfair ways, especially when it came to this family.

* * *

Rain pelted down in the courtyard as they all trailed outside behind Luther who was carrying Reginald's urn. Umbrellas were up sheltering everyone, except for over Diego who chose to embrace the rain and Luther who had his hands full.

As they crowded beside the oak tree and near Ben's statue their mom glanced about worriedly. "Did something happen?"

"Dad died. Remember?" Allison reminded her.

"Oh, yes, of course."

"Is mom ok?"

"Yeah, yeah, she's fine." Diego jumped in, ignoring the devastated expression Grace bore as she clutched her umbrella. "She just needs to rest. You know, recharge"

Pogo hobbled over and shot Lilith a disappointed look which the woman shrank back moodily at, then he turned to Luther. "Whenever you're ready, dear boy."

Luther nodded and unscrewed the urn, tipping it upside down and pouring out the ashes that dropped straight onto the ground in a tragic pile by his feet. Everybody cringed. Not quite the ceremonious event where the ashes got swept away by the wind as they'd initially planned.

"Probably would have been better with some wind," Luther admitted.

Pogo sighed, "Does anybody wish to speak?" he asked them, and everybody just turned their head away awkwardly. "Very well. In all regards, Sir Reginald Hargreeves made me what I am today. For that alone, I will forever be in his debt. He was my master. And my friend. And I will miss him very much. He leaves behind a complicated legacy-"

"He was a monster." Diego interrupted which made Klaus huff out a laugh, his breath showing as a plume of white steam against the cold air. "He was a bad person and a worse father. The worlds better off without him."

"Diego" Allison snapped, fingers tightening around her umbrella handle at her brother's behaviour.

"My name is Number Two. You know why? Cause our father couldn't be bothered to give us actual names. He got mom to do it." Diego continued nevertheless.

At her mentioning Grace piped up, "Would anybody like something to eat?"

"No, it's okay, mom," Vanya said kindly.

"Oh, okay."

Diego stepped into the middle of the crowd to address them all, blocking Reginald's ashes from their sight with his legs. "Look you want to pay your respects. Go ahead. But at least be honest about the kind of man he was."

"You should stop talking now," Luther warned Diego.

Diego fixed Luther with a cold stare, clearly hurting on the inside which was prompting him to lash out. "You know, you of all people should be on my side here, _Number One_. After everything he did to you. He had to ship you a million miles away."

"Diego stop talking."

"That's how much he couldn't stand the sight of you!" Diego growled, jabbing Luther in the chest with his finger then ducking from a punch being thrown his way, both of them breaking into a fight where their vision just seemed to go pure red with rage.

It was almost pathetic to the rest of them watching the pair punch one another around their fathers' ashes. The outbreak wasn't exactly all that surprising considering the tension between Luther and Diego had been stewing all day long. Whatever sorrow or anger Diego potentially felt towards their dad was being directly taken out on Luther.

"Boys, stop this at once!" Pogo yelled.

"Stop it!" Vanya called out as well, but both pleads were gone unheard by the two fighting superhumans.

Klaus, on the other hand, seemed highly amused…

"Hit him! Hit him!"

Lilith shot an unimpressed glare at Klaus from where she stood a little behind the crowd.

"I don't have time for this." Five muttered and began his trek back to the house. Lilith peered after him like she was contemplating leaving as well.

"Come here, big boy!" Diego taunted, Luther ran at him at full charge and swinging a punch which Diego ducked away from, resulting with Luther slamming his fist directly into Ben's statue and knocking it right off its pedestal. As the statue hit the ground the head went flying off. Everybody winced in disappointment at the scene.

"_Number One, Number Two_" The voice of Reginald Hargreeves shocked all the siblings who instantly snapped their heads towards the sight of their supposedly dead father standing where Lilith had been previously stood, an umbrella dropped beside his feet. "Pull yourselves together this instance." He ordered sharply.

They all stared with their mouths hanging open, unsure what was happening. They'd just spread their fathers' ashes on the ground yet here he was looking very alive and glaring at them all with the same sternness that was so hauntingly familiar. The even stranger part was that they had never seen their father wear heels.

"I don't understand…" Luther blubbered, hands falling limp at his sides.

"You…were…you were-" Diego tried formulating words but found them dying on his tongue.

Klaus gaped and pointed to Reginald. "Hey guys- I – I summoned Dad!" he announced gleefully.

"We see him too." Luther snapped.

Pogo from the sidelines shook his head and scoffed, digging his walking stick further into the ground with frustration at the children's gullible behaviour. He was fairly certain he'd raised them better… he'd hoped he had, yet here they were all acting as dense as could be.

Reginald then smirked at them all, only heightening their confusion since none of them could actually say they'd ever seen him smile before. Klaus actually made a relatively frightened noise at the sight of the old man smiling.

Then Reginald's body seemed to blur, reshaping in a matter of seconds until it was Vanya stood in his place this time. One Vanya was perfectly acceptable, but now there were two in the middle of the courtyard. The real Vanya paled considerably and gasped.

"I thought I asked you to stop fighting?" The… fake Vanya said in a sickly sweet and almost sarcastic version of Vanya's voice, wearing the same smirk as Reginald while pointing a gloved finger at the real Vanya who'd been trying to break up the fight. "Jeez, you guys got more dysfunctional after I left."

"Enough, Master Levi," Pogo told the fake Vanya who swirled on her heels to face Pogo with an exasperated expression.

"Party pooper." Fake Vanya retorted with a pout.

"E-Eight?" Allison stuttered, taking a cautious step towards the fake Vanya.

The fake Vanya sighed, hanging her head back to stare up at the sky, letting the rain patter against her face for a moment before her body shimmered into a quick blur and shifted. It began adopting a more masculine body structure that didn't increase greatly from Vanya's original size; a taller height and arguably a scrawnier frame, skin clinging tighter to the bones. The hair began shrinking into messy tufts and transforming into a brilliant white, showing no evidence of the same stylized perfection that Lilith's red hair had and not at all being aided by the rain dampening it. Vanya's clothes were replaced by an oversized grey hoodie and joggers, but the gloves and heels once again remained. Then lastly Vanya's dull brown eyes swirled into a pair of gleaming blue ones, poking out against porcelain-like skin.

"Holy shit," Diego swore under his breath.

Stood before them was Levi, obviously older now than their last memory of him but still recognisable. Levi set a nervous smile on them and opened up his arms in a sort of jazz hands gesture.

"Surprise?" he said with dry humour.

Silence.

* * *

**A.N: **Well, this was a really long chapter to read, I just really wanted to reach the funeral scene before chapter two so you all got to at least briefly get meet to Levi properly :')

Thanks for the reviews, I really appreciate them!

Also in case any of you want to know, the dance scene with 'Lilith' was inspired by how Alyssa dances in 'The End of The F***ing World' but pretend James isn't there. That's how I kinda envisioned it anyway! Because I loved that show too. Can you tell I like shows with chaotic energy? And if you'd like Lilith's face match it's probably Scarlett Johannson but with her Black Widow hair.

Annnnd I also had to change when Levi went missing, it was originally 19 years ago but I realised while writing this chapter that the Umbrella Academy officially started 17 years ago and I wanted him to be there for part of it so that he's included in some of the flashbacks. Sorry about that. It does mean he went missing around the same time as Five but hey ho. Maybe that's important to remember ;)

Anyway, hope you enjoyed! See you in Chapter 2!


	3. Two-Face

**Two-Face**

* * *

'Oh please don't ask me how I've been  
Don't make me play pretend  
Oh no, oh what's the use  
Oh please, I bet everybody here is fake happy too'  
\- 'Fake Happy' by Paramore

* * *

"Do any of you have a spare coat?" Levi's voice danced across the gentle shower of rain pattering down on the otherwise silenced courtyard. His playful jazz hands gesture that had been waved in their direction earlier had fallen so that he could swipe back up his umbrella with one arm and wring another around his lightly shivering frame.

"Levi?" Klaus blurted with goggled eyes, the first of them to find their voice again. He'd never been slow on rebooting his system after an initial shock. No, Klaus problem lay with gathering his wits. Especially right now since part of him was struggling to comprehend the picture in front of him, scrambling for some kind of explanation as to why Levi was stood no more than ten feet away from him. The first explanation that his mind concocted was that he'd finally swallowed one too many pills.

A smaller, more rational part of him bubbled with cautious hope that this really was the long-lost Number Eight. That part poked, prodded and encouraged him to run right across the courtyard and hug the life out of Levi just to confirm he was here. But he didn't. In fact, he was so terrified that if he did run over there his hands would simply go straight through Levi, confirming a deeply buried fear that hadn't surfaced in over ten years. Until now.

But with everybody else staring with similar shock-stricken expressions at the white-haired boy, Klaus convinced himself this must be real. No number of pills had ever been enough to help him conjure or even hallucinate Levi. Yet, he still didn't move, not willing to risk moving a single muscle due to the irrational fear that the second he did so Levi would just disappear all over again.

Levi didn't disappear. In fact, an almost bashful smile tugged at his lips and his fingers drummed against his side with a nervous rhythm implying he was thinking or processing their reactions. Without his disguises, Levi seemed far more skittish. Far more like a deer caught in the headlights.

"Oh my god." Allison gawked, a hand rising to hover in front of her gaping mouth. "Is that really you?"

That bashful smile dared to stretch wider as he nodded and opened up his arms to exaggerate his body. "In the flesh. You all really do make the worst detectives."

Luther's jaw finally stops hanging open dumbly enough for him to put his two cents into the conversation. "Hang on- You've been here this whole time? You didn't think to tell us instead of doing that whole show of charade? It's been years!"

Levi then rolled his eyes. "Great funeral, only one statue destroyed. I should get going now… places to be… headaches to nurture…" he said and gave them a half sarcastically preformed salute before making a beeline for the kitchen door. They watched him struggle to wear the heels now that his body proportions had changed, wobbling every now and then when the heel sunk too far into the dirt.

It took them a grand total of three seconds to kick into action and rush after him, all of them scrambling past one another to get through the kitchen door first.

"Wait- where are you going?" Vanya cried in a panic.

"You can't just leave! Like Luther said it's been years since we last saw you!" Allison protested, bounding her way into the kitchen to find Levi head first in the shoe cupboard, occasionally popping back out with a shoe in hand to check the size up against his own barefoot. The heels lay abandoned on the ground beside him. "Levi?"

She got a hum as a response.

Diego scoffed and planted his hands onto his hips. "Anymore missing siblings fancy showing up today?"

Klaus shot his hand up into the air, bouncing slightly on his feet. "Oh! Ben says he's here too!"

As if summoned, Five flashed into the kitchen to join them, giving Levi one judgemental stare before heading over to the cabinets to retrieve the marshmallow packet. He seemed relatively unfazed by the arrival, only showing any real acknowledgement by muttering a short, "Oh, finally."

"Hi Five, nice to see you're still the lovable little Brainiac." Levi responded without sparing Five a look either. "… Or lovable _old_ Brainiac now."

"Nice to see you _still_ don't possess the ability to do anything the easy way." Five countered, not missing a beat between them.

"Alright, alright. This is weirding _me_ out and that's saying something" Klaus declared loudly, waving his hands about while trying to digest the situation. "You disappeared. Poof. Gone. Without a trace. Yet here you are…"

"Acting like nothing happened." Diego finished for him.

Finally satisfied with a pair of shoes he'd found, Levi crawled back out the shoe-cupboard and tugged them onto his feet; they appeared to be some of Diego's old ones from when they all still lived here. They didn't quite fit Levi's feet, but they'd do. Once they were on, he got up and stretched his limbs out, cracking a few bones in the process.

"I always regret wearing heels. Every time." He complained, mostly to the air. "They're so uncomfortable I don't know how people wear them for _fun."_

Luther growled, "Where have you been?"

The smaller boy slunk across the kitchen to steal a handful of marshmallows from Five who swatted him away. "Aw did you miss me? I knew you all couldn't all have ice for hearts." He said almost scornfully before plopping one of the stolen marshmallows into his mouth.

"Levi," Allison begged, getting frustrated. "Please, where have you been? Why did you never… I don't know… tell us you were alive for starters?"

"Secret," Levi said around a mouthful of marshmallow.

Luther pinched the brim of his nose. "Well, some things never change…"

That made Levi grin and plop another marshmallow into his mouth, propping himself against the counter. Closer up now and without the veil of rain they could see him more clearly; as a child, Levi had always been bonny which had evidently reflected into his adulthood with his chiselled chin, button nose, and smooth skin. Likewise, Levi had always been the smallest boy of the group, which hadn't changed now either. He wasn't skinny in the same way Klaus was, Klaus was almost an unhealthy form of skinny whereas Levi was just built scrawny due to his demanding metabolism.

"So, may I borrow a coat?" Levi asked yet again, arms wrapped around himself now like he was shielding his body under their stares, the faintest blush blotching on his neck.

"Sure thing," Klaus says, valiantly tugging off his fur coat and thrusting it at Levi, glaring when he meets his eyes. "_Lilith."_

Levi pales ever so slightly, hurrying to put the coat on which hangs looser on him, reaching just past his thighs that were suddenly bare as the mirage of clothing disappeared. "Ah, right, yeah I can explain that one…"

"I hope you can," Diego says, sitting himself down on the table and crossing his arms, glaring across the room at Levi who was enveloping himself in the coat to hide his bare skin. It didn't take a genius to assume from the multiple clothes shifts that Levi was naked right now except for the coat, shoes, and gloves. They all remembered it was easier for him to do multiple shifts when not really wearing any clothes.

"Why aren't you wearing anything?" Klaus blurted still, acutely aware that his coat was now the only piece of clothing protecting Levi's dignity.

"I was in a rush and… look it doesn't matter it's not like any of you actually saw me naked, is it?" Levi bit back, the blush crawling up his neck to his cheeks. Wow, he was a lot easier to read without his disguises then. "And sorry I'm using your coat, but I've got a headache from over shifting. Plus, do you know how difficult it is to pretend I'm not freezing right now?"

Diego held up a hand, annoyance surging through him anew as the shock washes off his mind. "Let me wrap my head around this. We play a dumb little game of hide-and-seek. You disappear. We go home one person short, looking like a bunch of idiots, get our asses handed to us by dad for losing you. Then seventeen long god-damn years later, here you are straight out the blue pretending to be some woman called Lilith at dad's funeral and screwing about with us. Am I missing anything?"

Levi quietly picks at the last marshmallow in his fingers, laid back attitude cracking into looking sheepish and dare they say it- scared.

"Well?" Luther urges impatiently when the shapeshifter remains silent.

Five nearly scoffs at them but refrains. "Let the man breathe."

Luther only whirls on Five, still furious from the aftermath of his and Diego's fight. "Don't think you're in the clear on this either. You knew it was him earlier, isn't that right?" Luther accused with a pointed finger at an overly smug-looking Five.

"Well, I suppose if any of you had half a brain cell to pay attention to detail, you'd have realised exactly who _Lilith_ was." Five snarked back.

"And you're not even slightly surprised that he's spontaneously back?" Luther asked in disbelief at Five's nonchalant behaviour. "On the same day as you."

Five just shrugged, "I spent 47 years without any of you. I knew he'd be back, of course, perks of going to the future. Though… I have to admit your case is intriguing, I never did figure out what happened to you. My theory was you either took your chances on the road or government snatched you up. They always did keep tabs on us and our work."

Levi lightly cocked his head to the side with curiosity. "You knew I'd be back?"

"Future, dimwit."

"Right." Levi nodded with a lazy smirk then cleared his throat. "Well, sorry to blow a hole in your theories but it wasn't government."

"But you _did_ get taken?" Allison deducted.

That made Levi's smirk drop, clearly not liking that bit of information slipping past his breach. "Maybe." He muttered then rebuilt his defences and pushed away from the counter. "Maybe I did get taken. Or maybe I ran away. Or maybe I just got lost. Who knows?" He taunted them.

"Why are you being complicated?" Luther demanded, getting impatient. "We only want to help."

"It's been a long time Luther," Levi responded in a flash, his entire composure changing from uncaring and playful to cold and secluded within seconds.

"Please don't leave." Vanya suddenly pleaded, stepping forward while holding out one hand. "Please, we just got you back…"

Klaus scratched his chin stubble. "Yeah, plus that jacket was actually super expensive so if you'd kindly not leave wearing it. Not that it's like a Gucci level of expensive but you know."

Diego glared, "and you still haven't explained jack shit."

Pogo cleared his throat from the doorway. "Perhaps stay for some tea at the very least, Master Levi." He offered, a hopeful glint in his eye. "… Or alternatively, I'll have your mother prepare your old favourite; hot chocolate."

Levi nibbled at his lower lip and glared at the ground for a while like it was the cause of all his problems, before reluctantly nodding and crossing his arms.

"Alright. One drink." He decided.

* * *

They filtered into the lounge to seat themselves, Levi opting to seize the armchair closest to the fire and everybody else taking the couches. Well, everybody but Klaus who draped himself across the carpet beside the fire, topless after surrendering his jacket but that didn't seem to be bothering him in the slightest. Levi was a little more clothed now, Grace had fetched some shorts for him in the hurry so at least he wouldn't accidentally flash anybody through the jacket.

All of them stared at him as if he was some kind of error in the universe, which was rich considering Five had literally created a temporal anomaly to teleport back in time before their eyes less than three hours ago. All Levi had done was shapeshift.

Eventually, he chuckled and hung his head. "This is awkward."

Pogo took the lead when nobody else did. "It's good to see you're well, Master Levi. I had hoped one day you would be reunited with us, and I am glad to have lived to see the day. Though… I did not expect your return to be in the form of a woman portrayed in one of the paintings displayed in the house." He said, looking over his spectacle at Levi.

"I panicked," Levi admitted.

"Evidently."

"Wait… you knew it was him as well?" Allison asked.

"I did indeed. I've walked these halls my whole life, I think by now I must have every book, every artifact, and every painting in this house memorised so it wasn't difficult to recognise Master Levi." Pogo confirmed without a trace of guilt apparent for withholding information from them. "I tried to get him to drop the disguise when we spoke in private but… to no avail, it seems."

Vanya snapped her fingers in realisation. "Right! The painting mom gave you to help with your nightmares. I knew I recognised that face."

Levi smirked, "And I would have gotten away with it too if it weren't for you pesky kids!" he mimicked Scooby-Doo, unconsciously weaving his fingers through the dark fur on the cuffs of the jacket, finding the action oddly therapeutic.

"Tea!" Grace announced, striding into the room with a tray of steaming mugs. She rounded the room handing out a mug to each person.

"Thanks, mom," Diego responded gratefully.

When she reached Levi, she set the tray down on the counter and lifted up the final mug. "And of course for you, a hot chocolate with two shots of vanilla." She said, raising her hand to brush his cheek in a motherly fashion but before she could Levi jerked his head away and cradled the hot chocolate close to his chest. The reaction didn't go unnoticed by the rest of them who saw their mother's look of confusion at the rejection before deciding to shrug it off.

"Thank you." He muttered back to her, avoiding eye contact now.

"I know what'll cheer you up, some of those cookies I made with you yesterday," Grace told him.

"Mom, Levi's been missing for years." Allison reminded her, concerned, to say the least.

Grace's face fell, "Oh dear, really?"

Levi had to admit that stung more than just a bit, but he carefully kept his expression neutral and asked, "Are you ok?"

Grace shook the smile back onto her face. "Of course I am silly. Now, I'll fetch you those cookies." She said and bounced off towards the kitchen again, humming a small tune.

Nobody was quite sure what to make of that.

Klaus decided to move the topic onwards. "Well… I don't think tea is quite strong enough for this conversation so I'm going to need…" He stood up and thought for a moment, acting completely puzzled while clicking his fingers in search for the right word, before letting a relaxed smile melt over his lips. "Booze."

"Hey, you promised no more than eight drinks." Levi protested meekly, watching Klaus root through the bar to retrieve the bourbon he'd been drinking all day.

Klaus chuckled and unscrewed the bourbon lid, pouring some into a glass until it was half full. "Well, I did…but I promised that to Lilith, and she's not real. And besides, eight is your number. It's so… round and…two-faced."

"Two-faced, huh?" Levi sighed, running a hand up the back of his neck and through his hair. "Is that supposed to be a shapeshifter joke? I guess I deserved that."

"Can we talk about where the hell you've been now rather than Klaus'… drug habits." Luther proposed hopefully.

Klaus made an irritated sound with his throat. "Alcoholic habits, actually. Get your facts checked."

"You're still high as a kite." Diego reminded Klaus.

"Details shmetails."

"You said you were taken," Allison said, leaning forward in her seat which only prompted Levi to push back against his own.

"Did I say that?" he countered, wincing slightly and mentally pummelling himself for letting that bit of information slip earlier. The nerves began fluttering in his stomach. To settle himself he turned to Pogo. "Do you have any biscuits?"

"Don't change the subject-"

"- Custard Cream… a Digestive maybe? Either would-"

"_Levi"_

He glared at them heatedly. "What do you want me to say? Yes, maybe I was taken seventeen years ago but I'm here now and that's all that matters, isn't it? I'm alive and I'm doing just fine. Can't you all just leave it at that?"

"No" they all chorused.

"Of course, it matters." Vanya breathed, letting her head fall into her hands.

Allison seemed to get the memo that he wasn't comfortable addressing it directly so took a different approach. "You look well…how long have you been… um, free?"

A lump formed in his throat which he swallowed back thickly, the temptation to lie brewing on the tip of his tongue and luring him into a mental debate on how to reply, staring down into the mug at the thick, swirling liquid instead. To occupy the moment so it seemed less suspicious he took a large gulp of the hot chocolate then shrugged.

"About seven years, maybe." He told them and had to give himself a mental pat on the back because it wasn't a complete lie. He didn't _want_ to lie to them.

At that revelation they all gaped at him, betrayal and shock wavering over their expressions. But they couldn't know that it wasn't his fault that he stayed away for so long. They couldn't ever know he'd had no other choice than to stay away. Being here right now was a risk. Because he'd only been free _to some extent_ for seven years.

"Seven? You've been walking around as a free man for seven whole years and you didn't think to come back or… or heck to call maybe? We thought you might be dead!" Diego exploded on him.

"Oh, well then, I hate to break it to you all but I'm still alive." He snarked back with a firm grimace. "And I did call." He dared to tell them, fingers unintentionally curling tighter around the cup handle. "Once. Do you know what happened? Nobody picked up. So, I left a voicemail. None of you ever responded so I just figured you missed it or didn't care."

He didn't mention the part where he called at least seven more times out of desperation. He didn't mention the part where Reginald Hargreeves picked up the phone on his last attempt, listened to his relieved pleas for help, and without a word hung up. He didn't mention the part where he got beaten for three days after calling. And he definitely didn't mention the part where he lost all hope in the Umbrella Academy.

"We… we didn't know." Luther got out.

"Well you wouldn't would you." He grumbled, putting down his finished drink on the end table and drawing his legs to his chest to rest his chin on his knees.

"So, then who took you?" Vanya asked in confusion.

"I don't want to talk about it anymore," Levi replied softly, seeing Luther open his mouth to complain so he beat him to it. "I _won't_ talk about it anymore."

All of a sudden Klaus cackled and approached him until their faces were inches apart, "So… you've like been alive all this time?" he asked for clarification and Levi nodded reluctantly. Then Klaus flicked Levi's forehead for confirmation of his existence and backed away. "Wow… I thought I was just… just high and that's why I couldn't conjure you." Klaus admitted flippantly and everybody saw the guilt flash across Levi's face.

"Klaus…"

"That's a real cute move there Levi." Klaus continued while whirling around with his glass, its amber contents sloshing precariously at the sudden movements. Klaus seemed to be hiding behind his humour to counter the emotion flooding into his voice. "Come waltzing back into our lives then slam the door in our faces!"

"I don't understand why you won't just talk to us."

"What happened?"

"Just explain it to us-"

The room roared back into a hurricane of questions being thrown at Levi who was growing more and more anxious by the minute. With every question asked the further back he sank into Klaus coat.

"Are you _safe_?" Allison asked seriously, voice carrying over everyone else's.

His breath caught in his throat and he found the pressure building up so much he impulsively shifted into a different person which made them all blink in surprise to be staring at another Diego sat curled up on the chair hiding in Klaus coat. It was odd, for a millisecond Levi sat as Diego looking frightened, an expression none of them were accustomed to seeing on Diego's face. But the expression steeled itself quickly. Levi found his nerves settling, masking his own emotions to mimic Diego's.

"Knock it off," Diego warned Levi, uncomfortable talking to another version of himself.

"Sorry, this just helps with…stuff." He explained, making a lazy gesture with his hand to elaborate the point. "Of course, I'm safe." He told them calmly.

Not.

"And the people who took you are… gone?"

"Yep."

Nope.

"Do you have to be me?" Diego complained.

"What can I say, you've got great features." He teased cheekily which made Diego scoff and turn away to hide his amusement. "It's kind of a bad habit of mine, sorry." He apologised again and switched back to his normal self.

"Bad habit huh," Allison repeated, raising her eyebrows suspiciously at him.

"Yeah, they didn't call me _Mimic_ for nothing, right?" He said innocently, shooting her a toothy grin hoping that maybe if he smiled with his teeth she'd believe him. Usually, he was quite good at faking a smile, but with Allison's eyes boring into him he found it deflating under the inkling that she could see right through the facade.

Thankfully, she didn't make any kind of comment.

"Alright, so Lilith. How about you explain that one instead?" Luther asked, giving a sarcastic shrug. "Why'd you even drop the act at all if you didn't want to talk?"

"Oh my god Luther, you want to know why I came here as Lilith? You already said it. Because I didn't want this conversation. I didn't want to be bombarded with these kinds of questions." He sighed, pinching the brim of his nose and hating how the throbbing in his head made the situation 10 times worse. "But I dropped it because I didn't come back after all this time to watch you fight, not to mention decapitate Bens statue."

"After years don't you think you owe that to us, don't you think you owed it to dad? He looked for you for years and you show up only for his funeral!" Luther argued, crossing his arms.

That struck a nerve in Levi who's blue eyes glared icily. "_Owed_ it to you? I don't owe you anything, least of all him. Of course I only showed up to his funeral, I mean I only came to make sure he was well and truly dead."

Diego smirked up at Luther smugly. "See, I'm not the only one in the family who thought dad was a real piece of crap."

"Don't talk about him like that," Luther warned him sternly. "How can you say that after all those years we spent searching for you? Dad set up a-"

"-You know what this was a mistake." Levi interrupted while uncurling himself from the chair to get up, keeping his tone as level as possible. "Hey, Klaus do me a favour. If you ever get sober enough maybe you can pass along a message for me. Tell Reggie that Levi says he's a cold-hearted son of a bitch."

Luther mirrored Levi, jumping to his feet to grab the white-haired boy's arm in order to prevent him from leaving. Unbeknownst to everyone, the action jolted at least seventy different alarms to life in Levi's brain, all of them rattling around deafeningly loud and dripping panic into his system. Those alarms summoned the impulse to fight back against Luther or to scream or do something that didn't leave him trapped in place. But he didn't do anything. He drove the impulse back with every ounce of him, forcing himself to remain calm.

_Luther isn't a threat. Calm down. Calm down. Calm. Down._

"You don't just get to leave again. How can you just come in here pretending to be somebody else… and…and turn into dad at his own funeral! You won't even tell us who took you for crying out loud!" Luther exclaimed, oblivious to Levi's momentary internal crisis.

"Get off me," Levi said through gritted teeth.

"What happened to you?!"

"What happened to _you_ Godzilla? You're the one who magically turned into every WWE wrestler's dream body. What happened to _all_ of you? I might have been gone for a while, but I still remember what the team used to be. Could any of you confidently tell me what's going on in each other's lives?" he accused, and they all glanced downwards. "I thought not. Whatever was left of the Umbrella Academy it died with Reginald and got scattered with his ashes outside."

That brought another solemn silence that only increased Levi's guilt, especially upon seeing Pogo's hurt expression. He couldn't exactly say he was proud of what he said but… it felt too much like he was being pushed into a corner here.

"Let. Go. Of. My. Arm."

Luther did.

With that Levi gave them a sarcastic smile. "May I leave now?"

Allison rose her hands in defeat. "Please, don't let us keep you" She replied dryly.

He gave a stiff nod to them all then whirled on his heels and marched from the room with a scowl.

"Just another glorious family reunion!" Klaus's voice echoed into his ears.

"Levi… Levi wait-!" Vanya called but he only picked up speed and escaped out the front door, a desperate need for fresh air.

* * *

Vanya stared hopelessly out into swarms of passing people on the street, frantically trying to locate her brother who'd disappeared yet again. There were too many people, Levi could have transformed into any one of them. On the ground lay Klaus coat, the gloves, the shorts, and Diego's shoes. Essentially the only evidence proving he'd been here in the first place.

"Ms. Vanya, come back inside before all the cold gets let in," Pogo called after her, still in the lounge with everyone else.

Reluctantly she obeyed, frowning and collecting the clothes off the ground before retreating back inside the living room; making a point to leave the hallway lights on. Everyone else seemed unsettled but not willing to jump up and chase after Levi just like she had. Even Klaus, who shook his head and downed the rest of his drink in one big gulp. With a small sigh, she walked over to him and returned his coat.

Allison couldn't help but chuckle bitterly. "He used to do this all the time. Run off when something upset him." She said, finishing her tea and setting the empty cup down on its coaster.

"Why won't he tell us anything? He's acting like he didn't even grow up with us." Luther grumbled, his thumb ironing out the frustrated creases on his forehead.

"Because he didn't." Diego countered dryly.

"Well, what a pleasant surprise it was to see him again," Klaus said sarcastically.

"Might I implore that you all at least try to understand that this reunion is just as difficult for him as it is for you," Pogo advised with an edge of sadness to his tone. "Wherever Master Levi has been for all these years has evidently taken its toll on him. I have my doubts he intended on upsetting you all when he arrived this morning."

Five appeared in the room without warning which made Klaus jolt away from where he'd been leaning against the mantle of the fireplace, "Jesus! Somebody put a bell on him." Klaus muttered, shifting away from Five.

Five ignored him, "He's had to survive alone. _I know_ that feeling." He told them as if he'd somehow been present for the whole conversation.

"So, what, he doesn't trust us?" Diego shot back.

"I didn't say that." Five shrugged.

"Would you trust us?" Allison sighed and they all stared at her in confusion. "He got kidnapped. Right under our noses. Sure, we searched but we never found him. We can't just… force him to tell us what happened. I hate it as much as you do but the fact is that he's breathing and…that's good enough for me right now."

"No, Allison, you don't get it. What if this is connected to dad? He could still be in danger so we need to know the threat-" Luther began but she rose a hand to cut him off.

"We don't. He told us he escaped and that it's been seven years. Whatever happened to him… if it's bad enough that he doesn't want to tell us then we're going to wait until he's ready. I don't want to lose him again." She explained.

Vanya nodded in agreement. "He's scared."

"Which is exactly why we need to know-"

"_No,_" Vanya snapped, her usually gentle voice cracking out like a whip. "He's scared of us. Scared of telling us. How does it make anything better to just shout at him and demand answers?"

"Oh well, I'm sure you'd love that. More content for your sequel, right?" Diego retorted scornfully.

Allison glared at him, "She's right. We'd only be pushing him away."

Five rose his eyebrows at them. "Finally some of you have gained some actual sense." He commented, pulling up his sleeve to check his watch. "Though, what's there to push away? Did you all miss him hightailing it out the door due to your insensitive prodding?"

* * *

_**17 years ago...**_

"_Nietzche once said, man is a rope. Stretching between the animal and the superhuman. A rope stretching across the abyss. It is a dangerous crossing, a dangerous looking-back, a dangerous, trembling and halting."_

_Sir Reginald and a young Vanya stood at the top of the winding staircase, looking downwards to the first floor where the other children were eagerly waiting, dressed in green tracksuits. Reginald jotted down a note then turned to Vanya who was holding a whistle and a clipboard. She took that as the signal for her to blow the whistle and start the race. _

"_As much as you must strive for individual greatness and strive you must for it won't come to you of its own accord, you must also remember that there is no individual stronger than the collective."_

_At the sound of the whistle, all the children began sprinting up the stairs attempting to pass one another. Luther and Diego fought for first place as usual while Allison followed them close behind in third place, then Five, then Levi, then Ben, then Klaus. _

_Diego was in first place until Five teleported in front of him, surprising the other children slightly. They'd always had a weird unspoken rule against using their powers to cheat in things like this._

"_That's not fair- Fives cheating!" Diego exclaimed, feet pounding the stairs as he worked to run faster._

"_He adapted" Reginald corrected sternly._

_Levi grinned, "I can adapt too!" he declared boldly, pausing for a second in deep concentration before abruptly shrinking himself down into a young dog. Striking white fur darted between the other children's legs and up the stairs until Levi had overtaken Five, the others halted momentarily to gawk having never seen him turn into an animal before. His clothes lay crumpled in a messy pile on the stairs behind them all._

"_Careful Number Eight, your experience with performing a metamorphosis from the superior intelligence of a human to the more instinctual one of an engineered animal is weak." Reginald reminded the boy who was now a dog, receiving a bark as a response._

"_Oh yeah? Try this for adapting" Ben countered and suddenly began using his tentacles to climb up the railings._

"_I heard a rumour that everybody running up the stairs slipped!" Allison shouted forcing everybody to slip over instantly, earning a series of curses and complaints and whines being thrown her way. _

_Levi growled at Allison as she overtook him and began chasing after her only to be lifted into a pair of arms. In confusion, he saw Diego carrying him and began squirming frantically to break free, but Diego leaned over the railing and grinned to Ben who was climbing up._

"_Ben, catch!" he declared, dropping Levi off the stairwell and watching as Levi let out a series of angry barks before being caught by Ben who stumbled slightly at the added weight. Then Diego waggled his eyebrows and darted up the stairs._

"_That was dangerous- Diego nearly killed Levi!" Luther shouted in astonishment, charging after Diego who was gleefully nearly at the finish line._

_Ben scowled, "Five, all yours!" he said and tossed Levi into Five's arms, the boy stumbling slightly which provided Levi with the opportunity to jump back down onto the ground safely and continue the race, overtaking Klaus who was panting dramatically. Five teleported again besides Allison and crashed against the wall, becoming weaker with his spacial jumps._

_Diego finished first, giving a dramatic bow to Vanya who logged his time. Ben came second. Luther third. Levi Forth. Five Fifth. Allison sixth. Klaus Seventh. _

_Breathlessly they watched Reginald nod at them then wordlessly leave Vanya to record the findings. After catching their breath, they stared down at the fluffball peering up at them from the ground through sparkling blue orbs._

"_Levi?" Allison asked with a giggle, kneeling down to pet the dog who huffed but allowed it. "Oh my god, you can turn into animals?"_

_The dog gave a nod._

"_Since when?" _

"_This is so cool!"_

"_He's so cute!" Klaus declared. "You're a little Lassie!" _

_Levi growled and hit his tail against Klaus's leg._

"_Turn back already the race is over," Luther ordered with a grin. "Come on you have to tell us when you found out you could do this."_

_Levi nervously moved away from Allison and fixed them with an awkward expression, or at least the most awkward expression he could muster up while still in dog form._

"_What's wrong with him? Oh no is he stuck?" Vanya fretted, holding the clipboard close to her chest._

_Levi shook his head then padded over to Luther and bit his tracksuit bottom, tugging it slightly and then shaking his head at them._

"_Hey- just cause you can turn into a dog now doesn't mean you can-" Luther began complaining but Levi barked to shut him up, biting the fabric again then biting his own fur to try to prove his point._

_Klaus burst out laughing. "He's naked that's why he can't turn back," he explained, understanding what Levi was saying. The other kids started giggling along as well which made Levi growl in frustration and send a glare up at them. Klaus, in amusement swept Levi into his arms despite Levi protesting and wriggling frantically to get back down. "Aw who's a good puppy?" he mocked receiving a whack to the face with a paw. "Alright, alright-"_

_Levi was put back down and the dog darted from the room as they all attempted to calm their laughter. Two minutes later a fully clothed Levi remerged, face tomato red with embarrassment or anger._

"_YOU THREW ME OFF THE STAIRCASE-?!"_

_Everybody exploded into laughter again._

_._

"_The ties that bind you together, make you stronger than you are alone. They will make you impervious to the pain and hardship the world will thrust upon you. And believe me when I tell you, life will be hard. It will be painful."_

_They were all gathered in the entrance hall, waiting to get a tattoo done on their wrist to symbolise their union as a team to fight evil. As a binding factor to them all. It wasn't exactly thrilling to any of them and they'd rather be doing just about anything else than getting a tattoo, but none of them dared vocalise that though considering how pleased their dad appeared with them._

_Klaus went first, blinking back tears but getting through it with a surprising display of impassiveness, almost like he was beginning to like the sting of the needle towards the end. Unless he was feigning indifference. Once his tattoo was complete Levi was up next, not showing as much strength as Klaus had and letting out a series of undignified whimpers and a number of ignored complaints. When the final lines of the umbrella tattoo were finished, Levi was allowed off the torturous chair and didn't think twice about stumbling in Klaus direction to seek out some kind of comfort for a distraction, the taller boy, of course, was waiting for him with open arms._

_Reginald held a hand to stop him. "Number Eight." He said sharply and tossed over some gloves which Levi barely caught with his good hand, trying his utmost to stifle the snivelling breaking past his defences as he dragged the gloves over the sensitive skin that began flaring with irritation. He knew his dad wouldn't tolerate him breaking down, he knew he'd be disappointed, so Levi tried to stop the waterworks from starting up he really did. Klaus hastily crossed the distance between them, and Levi gratefully fell into his arms without a word, letting the much taller boy whisper words of praise into his hair and rub his back._

"_Don't be such a baby," Diego called to Levi, not having yet had his tattoo and practically bouncing on his seat with nerves. "It can't have been that bad."_

"_Hey, leave him alone," Klaus called back to Diego with a glare._

_Levi huffed against Klaus's chest, self-consciously realising he'd been the only one to cry about the tattoo so far. Without thinking he worked every ounce of his power to mimic the only emotionless person in the room; Reginald Hargreeves. It was the first time he'd considered copying emotions and not a form, so he worked hard to mimic the stoic expression of Reginald with his own features, finding it surprisingly easy to suppress his true emotions this way._

"_I'm fine." He said with a certain blankness about him that made Klaus glance down with concern, Levi didn't leave the safety of the hug just yet, but he'd definitely shut himself off. He might be able to mask his emotions, but he wasn't able to stop the pain; all he could do was pretend he couldn't feel it._

_Allison went next, crying worse than Levi had but staying stiffly in the chair to let the man do his job. Their mom gave Allison a supportive smile, though it wasn't enough to calm the small girls' sobs. The other children in the line were growing more anxious by the second being forced to sit and watch their siblings in such distress. Levi pulled away from Klaus eventually so that Klaus could comfort Allison when hers was complete. Admittedly Levi's embarrassment had fizzled out knowing he hadn't been the only one to cry over a tattoo._

_Wallowing in self-pity he leaned against one of the pillars in the room, watching Diego steel his expression and tensely sit in the chair to get the tattoo done. The bald man seemingly giving them these tattoos gave zero shits about their cries or that he was tattooing children. He refrained from making a petty comment to Diego, knowing his brother was in pain and would probably regret calling Levi a baby later. So instead he set to ignoring the burning on his wrist, allowing his gaze to wander upwards onto Vanya who lingered on the staircase alone. _

_Reginald momentarily left for something and Levi took that as his opportunity to dart past the tattoo artist and up the stairs, slowing as he reached Vanya only to see her drawing the tattoo onto her wrist with a black sharpie. Light filtered through the stained, pane glass at the top of the staircase, illuminating Vanya's dainty figure with soft blue, pink, and orange hues. It was debatable whether it was unfair that she hadn't been included in this whole event, on the one hand, Levi never wanted Vanya to feel as lonely as she often did or like she wasn't part of the team, but on the other hand… he didn't want her to have to sit through getting a tattoo cause it hurt._

_Cautiously he approached her with a sniffle, trying to push back his own pain that was threatening to break his emotionless mask. "Need some help?"_

_She side glanced him and nodded, handing over the sharpie which he took and began drawing on her wrist the same image they'd all got tattooed. Vanya just stared gloomily at it, watching him create the outline of an umbrella for her._

_He frowned, "you don't want it anyway, it's kinda ugly and hurts like a bitch."_

"_Don't let dad hear you say that." She murmured._

"_What? Bitch or that the tattoo sucks?" he jested weakly and finally earned a smile from Vanya who stared at the finished drawing that looked roughly similar to the tattoo. _

_She outstretched her arm to examine it. "Both. I guess it does kind of suck though"_

_Levi smiled and poked her nose. "Exactly. No more disappearing into that head of yours V. Not without consulting me first."_

_She chuckled, beaming at the drawing on her wrist. "I won't."_

* * *

_***Present time***_

"Where's Vanya?" Allison asked, walking into the kitchen to find Five raiding the shelves and Klaus sat at the table cradling a guitar.

"Oh, she's gone," Klaus informed her, plucking lightly at the guitar strings.

"That's unfortunate." Five muttered, retreating from the shelves with a grimace. "An entire square block. Forty-two bedrooms, 19 bathrooms but not a single drop of coffee."

"Dad hated caffeine."

Klaus chuckled darkly. "Well, he hated children, too, and he had plenty of us."

"I'm taking the car." Five decided.

That piqued Klaus interest who removed his feet from the table and leaned forward. "Where are you going?"

"To get a decent cup of coffee" Five snapped back at him.

"Do you even know how to drive?" Allison countered, folding her arms.

"I know how to do everything," he told her arrogantly then disappeared.

Klaus got up worriedly. "I feel like we should try and stop him. But then again, I also just kinda want to see what happens." He said, the sound of a car engine starting up outside catching both their attention.

Diego strolled into the room carrying his bag. "Alright, I guess I'll see you all in what? Ten years when Pogo dies."

Allison shook her head. "Not if you die first."

"Yeah, love you too, sis." Diego retorted, picking a marshmallow from the packet left on the table. "Good luck on your next film, hope it turns out better than your marriage." He said coldly, plopping the marshmallow in his mouth. Allison refrained from making a snide comment back and instead stormed out the room.

Klaus perked up. "Are we leaving?"

"No, I'm leaving. Me by myself."

"Oh, fabulous I'll get my things," Klaus exclaimed clapping his hands.

As Klaus hurried through the corridor to get his belongings before Diego left without him, Allison came back into sight and blocked his path, one eyebrow raised. "You're really leaving as well?" she asked in minor disbelief.

"Uh, yeah." He nodded in confirmation like she was dumb. "I need to… take my mind off things for a while. A long while."

"Even after…?" she trailed off, but Klaus knew what she meant. She understood why Diego was leaving, but Klaus… after Levi returned? Everybody knew that back when they were young Klaus and Levi had been close; just like how everyone knew of how close Allison and Luther were.

"After what, dear sister?" Klaus asked anyway, pretending to be oblivious to what she was hinting. "Now, excusez-moi, s'il vous plait." He requested, squishing himself against the wall to squeeze past her.

She shook her head and watched him go. They couldn't just play happy families once, could they?

* * *

_Dammit, dammit, dammit!_

Levi found himself running the block at least ten times in dog form, getting completely drenched in the rain but thankfully the thick tufts of fur on his body kept him warm. After wearing himself out he padded his way back to a familiar alleyway, he'd stashed some of his belongings behind a dumpster here before venturing to the academy earlier today. He shifted back into his human form and collapsed against the wall, rain droplets falling from his hair onto his cheeks, but he ignored it along with the biting chill it brought. Part of him wanted to invite in the panic that was rattling the closed gates of his mind, the panic he was all too familiar with. But part of him knew better now. He wasn't that person anymore.

So, he closed his eyes and coaxed the panic away, just as he always did. The swelling feeling inside his gut lessening until he could relax slightly in the gathering puddles.

Seeing everybody… it had been tough. Actually talking to them again? Worse. Well, what did he expect? They haven't exactly drastically changed so Luther's macho behaviour shouldn't really shock him. But how could he possibly even begin to reveal to them everything he'd worked so hard to stow away?

How could he tell them he wasn't even away from it?

A ding came from his bag which provoked a devastated whimper from him. This was the last thing he needed now. Reluctantly he unzipped the rucksack and dragged out a phone to view the screen that began blurring from the rain droplets landing on it.

That didn't matter, he wiped them away and in clear, bold letters read the message **'**_**Mission 807 terminated. Await further orders.'**_

He blinked. A mission for him had never been terminated before. The suppressed fear spiked again, knowing he'd failed the mission but also knowing it hadn't exactly been his fault. How was he supposed to know that Reginald would have a heart attack? Were they angry at him now because he failed? What was he supposed to do now? Go back to New York? The message just said to await orders and nothing more.

Keeping strict reigns on the hope threatening to build inside him he wiped the screen again and began typing a reply back, something he rarely did. In fact, he'd never typed back to this number before. He'd never risked it. Maybe this time it was worth it though.

**'** _**Where am I supposed to go now?'**_

A reply was sent back within minutes.

**'** _**Await further orders.'**_

Now he felt a little frustrated, what did they expect him to do? Sleep on the streets? It's not like they provided him with any accommodation. It wouldn't be his first time sleeping on the streets so that wasn't exactly anything uncommon to him. He stuffed the phone back into his pocket and began nibbling his nail anxiously.

He could stay here. Or at least until he received a message saying otherwise. That was new. For once… he actually kind of was a free man.

The thought made a laugh bubble in his chest, rising until he was cackling manically in the alleyway like a madman, anybody passing would certainly hasten their step to get by. Who was Levi kidding? He was never a free man, but right now he could go anywhere he wanted to because nobody had told him otherwise. Nobody had told him he had to stay in a certain area. Granted he could still get in big trouble for staying in _this_ area, but he was willing to chance it.

After years of being conditioned to follow the rule that he wasn't allowed in this neighbourhood or even really in this city, he couldn't help but be a little skeptical. It was one thing to give him such a kick-up-the-balls kind of mission that hit close to the heart of the academy, but another to terminate the mission and imply Levi could remain here for a while. Was this some kind of test?

His mind hurt from thinking about it. Honestly, test or not he didn't care. All he knew was that today he'd spoken to everyone he'd only dreamt of speaking to for years and he'd thrown it away like it was nothing. He also, strangely enough, hadn't gotten in trouble for speaking to them yet, which was also mildly worrying. Maybe it had slipped under the radar? Like hell he was going to mention that he spoke to the old team...he'd get his ass handed to him for sure.

Shaking his head, he got up and wracked his mental face bank for somebody to shift into, morphing his body into a random person so he wasn't recognisable. Idly he began wondering where to go. As if he was spending his free time by a dumpster. The question of what to do and where to go buzzed around his thoughts for a while. He could go back to Jason's hotel room…he had been crashing there for a few days now. It had just been a convenient place to stay for free since it was in the same zone where his mission had been assigned. Well, he says 'free' very loosely.

Or…

A thought blossomed in his mind that made him stop in the streets. There was always the academy. It… would definitely get him in trouble if he went back there but… could he? That was potentially an open door for him. But beyond that door was questions and secrets and anger that he didn't want to unlock. He wasn't comfortable unleashing it after years of pent up emotion that had almost crumbled down in one conversation. He wasn't good with his own emotions, dealing with his own problems. He knew that.

So instead of going back to the academy, he decided to do something he knew he was good at, something that gave him a reassuring sense of control again. Something that would definitely serve as a distraction and help him pretend he didn't have to deal with an avalanche of problems slowly building up.

He went to the hotel.

Then at the hotel, he spent the remainder of the afternoon pretending to be whatever or whoever Jason wanted him to be.

* * *

**A/N: **Sorry, this chapter took a bit longer to upload than the last one. I've realised that a shapeshifter is not the easiest to write lol. Also, I'm kind of making up my own shapeshifter rules as I go along, I have a rough set of rules I'm trying to follow so far. Unsurprisingly it's difficult figuring out all the weaknesses for a shapeshifter, I have a few which are already apparent in this chapter, but Levi is already looking overpowered. I'm so excited for you guys to see the rest of what he can do with his power though! Cause we haven't even unpacked it all. I guess we are only on chapter 2.

Anyway yeah, that's the real Levi! Hope y'all like him he's got a bundle of issues and too many secrets. Also, one of you (PRFH) commented asking which actor Levi looks most like... which is kind of a difficult one because I don't know many actors that would match Levi's description. The closest I've found was actually somebody who popped up on my Pinterest, I think his name is Conner Dennis? And I think he's an Instagram model, I don't know. Just google him with white hair if you want to see! He's kind of how I imagined Levi looking but a bit older obviously. The best actor/singer would probably be someone like Troye Sivan.

Anyhoo, see you in the next chapter!


	4. 0 to 100 Real Quick, Five

Next Chapter! Thank you for the lovely reviews I love hearing from you guys! (I'll talk more at the end of the chapter)

Also, **WARNING** Levi's backstory _is_ explored more in this chapter and might be triggering for some people, there are hints that he's been forced into sex work so I'm putting a warning here for that, also for drug use and mild sexual content (kind of) but it's not too explicit. Likewise, it will gradually be referenced more as the story progresses.

But this IS the Umbrella Academy we're talking about so...theres more to be unravelled. Which means potentially more future warnings. Which may even mean changing the rating. Oh dear these poor babies.

* * *

**0 to 100 Real Quick, Five**

* * *

_' If I go, there will be trouble_  
_And if I stay it will be double'  
_\- Should I Stay or Should I Go

* * *

"What the fuck is wrong with you?"

Levi humorously could only imagine that if his life was depicted on TV this would be the point where there would be a freeze-frame, a record scratch, followed by him having to narrate what the hell was going on. But of course, this was real life, so time didn't magically freeze for him. Time just laughed at him and the absolutely atrocious state of his life as he gathered all of his belongings off the hotel floor in a quick rage.

In response to Jason's statement, Levi just stuck his middle finger over his shoulder with imaginary steam bursting from his ears. Jason was propped up on the bed behind him, a wine glass in one hand and a cigarette in the other, throwing curses at him like there was no tomorrow. It wasn't necessarily uncalled for… Levi did deserve it.

"Aren't you gonna chat back like you usually do? Don't you have some uppity smart-mouthed comment for me?" Jason demanded and Levi remained pointedly quiet. "Speak when you're spoken to!" Jason yelled before taking another gulp of crimson liquid. Yeah, the guy was well and truly wasted which often made him run his mouth like this. Tonight, Levi didn't particularly have the strength for putting up with it.

"Fine, I'll speak; go to hell." He managed to growl back, stuffing some of his dirty socks into his bag and scanning the floor for anything else he owned. He'd never had much to his name, so there wasn't an awful lot to collect anyway. He was already wearing his only pair of jeans and shoes. Thankfully he found his sweater half under the bed and grabbed it, tugging it over his head and relishing at the soft material on his skin. There was no way he was going to shift clothes onto his body and freeze to death outside for the second time today. It was like...raining earlier and everything.

Even the bloody weatherman hated him.

"I'm not paying for you to malfunction you little shit. I give you a roof over your head and you can't even work for it? You're such an ungrateful little shit sometimes you know that?" Jason continued, tapping his cigarette and making ashes rain over the crumpled white sheets he was led on.

Suppressing the urge to do something stupid like punch Jason's _stupid_ face he hauled on his backpack and began stomping towards the doorway. "Please don't be like this. I'm just _tired. _I can't help it if my power's been exhausted. It's not malfunctioning."

"I'm not paying you to be tired. Fucking hell, you disappear all day and leave your crap all over the place, come back and then can't even do what I ask? Unless you're starting to think that I _want_ to fuck _you." _Jason continued ruthlessly and Levi had to refrain from pointing out that even though Levi might have looked completely female and dressed up like a Russian Maid, it still _technically_ meant Jason was sleeping with him. Whether he liked that or not. It wasn't like shapeshifting erased Levi from reality entirely.

"Holy god Jason I had to attend a funeral today, cut me some slack." Levi retorted, hand gripping the door handle so tight his knuckles popped white. "I didn't mean to revert back to myself but like I said I'm _tired."_

Jason scoffed uncaringly. "Cool. So what, are you expecting me to coddle you about it? When are you gonna be back up to working standards? 'Cause if you're expecting me to pay you for this then- where are you going?"

"Out." He snapped, flinging open the door.

Jason threw his head back and laughed. "Where are you gonna go, do you even have any money? Face it, you need me. Who else is gonna take in strays?!"

"Well anywhere is better than here with your sadistic ass!" Levi shouted back, raising his voice for the first time that evening which he knew wasn't a good idea when it came to clients but he was far too angry to care.

"Sleep on the streets then! You hear me!? You have nowhere else to go!"

The door swung shut behind him as he escaped into the corridor, still hearing Jason's muffled shouts through the thin walls as he marched onwards, ignoring the people sticking their heads out from their rooms to see what all the commotion was about. They should mind their own damn business. It probably appeared like some kind of tragic break up, which wasn't even remotely true because for one he and Jason weren't a couple, and for another, he knew damn well how he'd probably wind up back in Jason's bed in the nearby future anyway despite their row. It's what always happened when they fought.

And all they were fighting about was a silly mistake made on his behalf.

See here's the thing, Levi was a born actor. Being partly raised in a brothel made him pretty receptive on how to use his _talents _to gain money. Of course, back when he was knee-deep in the sex industry not a dime of that money he earnt went into his pocket, but things were different now. He'd been sold into a new hell now. This new job didn't really associate itself with the sex industry which was a plus. It was more criminally based in his opinion.

However, that didn't mean Levi was out of the sex industry completely. Because, if Levi had learned anything from his past it was that people would pay a god damn lot for sex. Throw being a shapeshifter into the equation? Well, let's just say during his early years he was in very popular demand. So, sex became standard operating procedure for Levi when It came to making money, even after he got sold out of the brothel. He was on the streets and sleeping with anybody who wanted to sleep with him even if he didn't necessarily want to be doing it. In his head, it was the same as not wanting to go to work, right? And what did it matter if it was wrong or made him feel like utter dirt? He'd been doing this stuff his whole life anyway. There was no point stopping now if it meant he could make the money for himself. All he had to do was make sure his main job didn't find out about it.

It was quite comical really because deep down he didn't want to sleep with these people, and nobody actually wanted to sleep with him either. But did they want to sleep with a Russian Maid? A Fireman? A celebrity? A dominatrix? Well, Levi could be any one of those things. And you know what? Once people learnt about his powers, they'd make _requests. _After he shifted form it was like they stopped remembering it was actually him.

Which is exactly what he just fell out with Jason about. Jason had a nasty habit of erasing Levi from his memory when they slept together, only acknowledging whoever Levi was pretending to be. After visiting the academy and shapeshifting all day his powers were considerably weakened, so it wasn't that surprising that he failed to keep up a form for Jason.

So...yeah, it's his fault… Jason had every right to shout at him back there. Most people from Levi's line of work might have done something worse in the same circumstances so shouting wasn't all that bad.

But Jason? Jason wasn't entirely a client.

Jason was different. Jason was something that was _his_. Something secret from his main job. Something that he'd worked on all by himself.

Their relationship was… rocky at best. But it was kind of functional for him. Jason had wormed his way into Levi's life, learnt what he did for a living and decided he wanted a piece of the cake. Correction, Jason decided he wanted _the whole cake_. Jason had been the person to sweep him off the streets and into fancy hotels, showering him with gifts, money, and affection that he'd been starved of for so long.

Eventually, Levi had stopped his little self-made business of selling himself on the streets, too caught up with Jason and his main job. And maybe, just maybe there had been a small period of time where Jason didn't pay him, and Levi didn't ask him too. Maybe there had been a time where Jason was more than a client to him.

Stupid. So stupid. Levi was foolish for thinking he was anything more than a body to anyone. That's all he'd ever been, all the way back to when he was in the academy and Reginald exploited his powers to their limits. Just a body. And most of the time, his body looked like somebody else's.

Shaking his head to rid it of his mental sob story, he escaped into the cool air of the night, leaving the hotel behind him as he weaved his way through the lines of people passing by. Everybody around him was completely oblivious to one another. So naive to each other's problems while being too caught up in their own. Levi could bet with a strong degree of certainty that his problems would surpass theirs by a mile.

He felt like he could still hear Jason shouting, like tinnitus ringing in his ears.

'_Nowhere else to go!'_

Yeah, screw that. Levi wasn't exactly rich, but he had enough money to open up at least a few options…

His stomach growled.

Well, there we go. Option number one; get food somewhere. That seemed like a pretty attractive option in his humble opinion. Shapeshifting consumed a lot of valuable energy which meant he should probably eat more than he does. He'd probably had like… a granola bar today. No wonder his powers gave out earlier.

Decision made, he set forth on a mission to locate a fast food joint of some sorts. The thought of a cheeseburger had his mouth-watering… with fries on the side… a huge chocolate milkshake-

"You're not an easy person to find." A familiar voice said casually, making him startle and glance downwards to find Five walking beside him like he'd been there for a while now. "It's a stroke of luck for me that you aren't in your disguises right now."

_Oh, his day just gets BETTER and BETTER, doesn't it?_

Brushing off his initial shock he simply shrugged and feigned impassiveness. "If this is going to become a new thing could you at least give me some warning next time? And I'm not hiding. Though I wasn't exactly hoping to run into any of you…care to explain how you knew I'd be here?"

Five smirked up at him. "You're predictable. There are only so many places you could have possibly gone after this long. I took my chances betting that you'd eventually go to a food joint, and this was one of our old favourites." He explained, gesturing to the fast-food restaurant they were approaching. "Remember the days we'd sneak off here and get doughnuts after, stuff our faces until we puked…"

Despite himself, he smiled at the memories as he pushed his way into the restaurant. "Yeah, those were the days, huh?" He felt the rush of warmth hit him the second they were inside, inhaling the unforgettable smell of grease that virtually stained the walls of this place. Deciding Five didn't seem to have any plans of leaving him alone any time soon he thought he may as well be polite. "Do you want anything?"

"Coffee."

With that, they ordered at the till while being served by a podgy man with a beard who insisted that they had to try the new American Whopper Cheeseburger. Levi obliged and bought two of those, some chips, a chocolate Sunday, water and a cup of coffee. Once they'd collected their food, they set to find a table which wasn't difficult considering it was getting late out, so it was relatively empty inside here. They slid into one of the red booths and Levi immediately tucked into his first burger as Five sat and watched him, occasionally taking tentative sips from his drink.

"Is that blood?" Levi finally asked something that had been bugging him since they'd sat down, staring pointedly at Five's collar that was partially stained crimson alongside a splatter up the side of his neck. It didn't look like it was coming from an open wound, but it certainly hadn't been there earlier.

Five pulled at his collar in irritation. "Don't worry about it."

Fair enough.

"So, any particular reason you came all the way out here looking for little ole me?" Levi asked with a more playful tone now that his belly was filling up with food. He'd already demolished the burgers and chips and was shovelling ice cream into his mouth. His previous anger at Jason was draining from his mind. And while he might be a bit anxious when it came to seeing everybody from the academy, he was strangely alright with talking to Five considering that... Five had been missing for quite some time as well. Sue him for being mildly curious.

Five pierced his lips. "Well, for starters you ran out on us earlier before I had any real chance to speak with you in private."

He winced. "Sorry…"

"Don't be. I understand why you left; the others speak but they don't listen. You're under no obligation to explain anything to us and I won't expect you to, therefore, I'm not here to berate you for keeping secrets from us. Quite frankly I don't care." Five told him, staring blankly out the window of the restaurant. Rain droplets still dribbled down the glass panes despite the fact it stopped raining about an hour ago, and darkness had fallen making it difficult to really see further than the light of the restaurant allowed them too.

"…Thanks, I think?"

Five frowned like he was conflicted then continued. "However, I am desperate. So, I've decided that we're going to sit here until you understand something. If you're anything like you were when we were kids, then I'm hoping you'll be of some use to me."

He shifted in his seat uncomfortably. "What do you mean?"

"Since I've already tried to lay the news down gently on Vanya and she didn't receive it as adequately as I might have hoped, I'm just going to get straight to the point with you. To be blunt...the world is going to end in eight days, and I have no idea how to prevent that from happening." Five explained to him, analysing his reaction carefully.

Levi sat blinking at the boy, hand paused midair holding up a spoon still half in his mouth. The cogs turning inside his brain were trying to process what Five had just revealed, struggling under the weight of the information. Part of him was half expecting the whole academy to jump out on him and yell 'psyche!' because honestly, that wouldn't surprise him at this point. But nobody did jump out.

"Fii-fgh" He spoke around the spoon in his mouth having partially forgotten it was there, then slightly embarrassed he dumped it back into the sundae glass and tried again. "Five, what the hell do you _mean _the world is ending in eight days? That's not something you just casually drop into conversation."

Five grimaced. "What part didn't you understand?"

"Tell me you're joking."

"Do I _look _like I'm joking?"

"No of course not… you're Five you never joke. So…jeez ok." He breathed, scratching the back of his neck and suddenly not as interested in his half-eaten chocolate sundae. "Are we talking end of the word as in… meteorite? Nuclear warfare? Natural disaster? You need to be a bit more specific with me here. If it's zombies, then sorry but that's a big nope from me."

The glare Five sent his way was truly lethal. "Zombies?"

"Ok, stupid thought. Got it. Can you really blame me? I'm freaking out a little bit. How have you been strutting around all day holding onto the knowledge that we could all potentially die in what was it…?"

"Eight days." Five supplied for him. "And I'm _not _calm. I don't know how the world is going to end, all I know is when it's going to happen. Do you know what I found in the future? Nothing, absolutely nothing except for the goddamn date of the coming apocalypse." Five revealed then rummaged in his pocket to pull out an eyeball. "And this."

Levi leaned back against his seat staring at the tiny ball in Five's fingers, sinking lower and lower into a state of confusion. "Why are you carrying around an eyeball?"

"Because I found all your bodies. Even yours." Five began explaining and Levi realised much to his relief that the eyeball was marble and not, in fact, a real eyeball. "And Luther was clutching this in his hand. Whoever owns this eyeball instigates the apocalypse."

"Five… that...that doesn't even make sense! How do you know that the previous owner of that eye is the one that starts this so-called apocalypse?"

"It's all I have to go on." Five shrugged.

"Ok…right… ok." He muttered, drumming his fingers on the table. "This is crazy, you're aware of that right?"

"But you believe me?" Five pressed hopefully.

Levi stared at Five, trying to catch him in some kind of bluff but recognising that Five had close to no reason to lie to him right now. With a sigh, he let his head fall into his hands, elbows resting on the table. "I guess."

"You guess? I told you that I need you to understand so it's a yes or no kind of question,_ do you believe me_ because I'm not so sure Vanya did." Five growled.

"I don't know! Ok? I just wanted ice-cream so give me five seconds to process this."

Five scoffed, leaning back in his own seat. "Well, I also know all about the burn mark on your wrist." He stated bitterly which made Levi freeze. Five recognised the tension radiating from Levi and knew he'd hit the mark he'd been aiming for. "Oh yeah, pulled all your bodies out from the rubble of the academy. Everyone still had their tattoo. Everyone except for you. It took me a while to realise how old the scar was-"

"-Alright I believe you." Levi glared.

Five rose an eyebrow. "Touchy subject?"

"Shut up."

"I already told you, I don't care about your past. Not right now. So, you don't have to explain anything to me. But In order for there to be a future, I need your help."

"Why me? Don't you have a team of superhero misfits already at your disposal?" He reminded Five snidely. "I'm sure any one of them would be more than happy to lend you a helping hand."

"You once considered yourself part of that team." Five reminded him challengingly. "And because I don't know who to trust right now." He elaborated, gesturing to the blood on his collar briefly. "I'm taking a gamble here with you. Regardless of trust, I need to find the owner of this eye and you're the most viable one to help me successfully achieve that. We'll talk more about this tomorrow. I assume you're coming back to the academy with me now?"

Levi gaped, a hand weaving itself through his hair. "I… I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know? I just told you the world is ending, and you _don't know_?"

"It's complicated, Five!" he snapped back, getting frustrated. "It's a lot more complicated than just going back."

"How is it complicated? Spell it out for me. Do you know what's complicated? Stopping the world from ending with only a fake eyeball as a lead." Five argued back.

"Because… I'm not allowed. I can't just- I don't know if I can just…" he stammered, panic rising inside him that he was trying to push down.

Five rose another eyebrow at him then. "Listen I don't know what's going on with you, but this is more important. If you're not going to help me then this has been a waste of my time hasn't it?" He spat and made to get up.

Levi held out a hand abruptly. "Wait- wait…alright. Fine, I'll go back with you. But only because the world is ending and…" _and it won't matter if he gets in trouble if the world ends. _"And we'll find the eyeball owner or whatever."

"Good." Five nodded, for the first time smiling properly. "I'll see you back home then." He said and disappeared in a flash.

Levi's head slammed against the table.

* * *

What to do… what to do.

Levi found himself standing on the pavement opposite the academy, scowling at its exterior. How easy it would be to just walk away right now and save himself from his own mental torture. But alas, here he was debating on what to do.

If he walked in that academy right there right now, he might get in more trouble than he's ever been in before. He got beat for three days for defying orders by just calling the academy. What would the people who owned him do if they actually knew he went there without direct instructions to? Earlier was an exception.

So, his options basically were; walk away and potentially let the world end or help save the world and get punished for it later because he went to the academy. How was this a fair choice?

What had the world ever even done for him?

He couldn't help but wonder what he would be saving. In his eyes, he'd be saving a life of being controlled and taken advantage of. The world didn't treat him kindly. Why should he save it? Maybe it would be better to just let it end…

_No._

Angrily he kicked a stone on the ground, watching it bounce across the road. There were still people who deserved the world. People like Allison who had a daughter from what he'd seen on TV. There were still people out there who saw life as something worth living, which was a good enough reason for him to at least try help save the world. If he didn't do anything while holding the knowledge of the coming apocalypse then he's partially responsible for it, right?

_Obviously,_ he was going to help save the world which irritated him to no end because it just reminded him of how Reginald conditioned them to respond to danger like this. In a sickeningly self-sacrificing manner. Maybe going back would get him in trouble with his superiors but… it'd be worth it. Besides, they'd already given him an initial mission based at the academy so…he couldn't get in too much trouble for going somewhere they'd originally sent him... right?

Heart flipping, he glanced at his phone and re-read the message he'd received approximately one week ago:

**_'_ _Mission 807: Terminate Reginald Hargreeves'_**

He tusked and stashed away his phone again, still not understanding why they'd given him of all people that mission. It was a mystery to him why his superiors had wanted Reginald dead in the first place. Nor was he sure how they expected him to kill somebody he might have once considered a father, not that he held any particularly nice opinions of Reginald anymore. The whole mission felt like a test of loyalty or something.

But the point still remains that saving the world is more important than Levi's shitty life like Five had said. Therefore, he would go back and face everybody so that they got to continue living a life he never and could never have.

And _fuck _maybe he just wanted to do this for himself as well. Because… despite the fact he ran out he knew deep down he'd really missed those dysfunctional, argumentative, gear grinding idiots. He'd only ran because Luther was pressing too much. Truth be told even if it did borderline evoke a panic attack in him, it was kind of… nice knowing they cared that much about him still. If he left now, he might never see them again. With that in mind, he felt under some kind of obligation to go back there. _He wanted to go back there._ For once maybe he should just do something that he wants to do and damn the consequences.

Besides, free place to stay.

_Also saving the world. _

Decision made he crossed the road and dragged his feet up the familiar steps of the dull building, raising a shaking hand to knock against the black door that had the classic umbrella symbol painted onto it. After several moments the door creaked opened to reveal Pogo dressed in a nightgown and carrying a set of keys. Upon seeing Levi, he smiled warmly.

"Ah, Master Levi. Come on inside before you catch yourself a cold." He ushered Levi inside, closing the door behind them. "You've returned, this time as yourself much to my relief."

Levi shuddered and wrapped his arms around his frame. "I'm… I'm sorry I ran out earlier," He apologised quietly.

"Not to worry. I had my suspicions that you would be returning at some ungodly hour of the night. That's why I left the lights on," He said which admittedly made Levi smile more than he meant too. "Come along. Let's get you warmed up." He told him, directing him into the lounge to begin starting up a fire.

Seconds later as if summoned, Grace came bobbing down the stairs to join them, straightening her hair and heading over to them. "Oh dearie, what have I told you about sneaking off so late?" she scolded him exactly like she used to.

"Are you honestly surprised?" He replied with ease.

She chuckled and bopped his nose. "You stay put; I'll fetch you some warm clothes." She told him then hurried off before he had the chance to mention that he was wearing real clothes right now so didn't need a replacement.

"Is anyone here still?" he asked curiously.

Pogo hesitated with stoking the fire to frown. "Master Luther and Miss Allison are sleeping in their old bedrooms. As for the others, I do believe they returned to their respective homes shortly after your departure."

Levi nodded, having been expecting that kind of answer. "Oh." Was all he managed to say, stiffly seating himself on the couch. Wonder where Five was then.

Pogo side glanced him. "I'm sure they'll pay a visit sometime soon. If not there's always Allison and Luther."

He snorted. "Yeah, I'd rather not third-wheel." He jested weakly then stared at the flames igniting. "Do they ever visit?"

"…Not often. Luther remained here the longest… trying to keep the team spirit alive. Then he had a mission situated on the moon and left to see it through. The house has been quiet ever since," Pogo explained sadly. "Admittedly I do miss seeing you children wreak havoc in these halls."

Levi relaxed with a smile and leaned over the arm of the chair. "Who was the worst?"

Pogo shot him a knowing look. "Not to point fingers but there was a certain individual who'd find it highly amusing to sledge down the stairs and pretend to be Sir Reginald to get the other children to surrender their desserts."

Levi's eyes practically sparkled. "Wow, wonder which one of us did that?"

"Yes, it will forever remain a mystery." Pogo replied sarcastically then chuckled. "None of you held the title of being the so-called worst. You were all as bad and as good as each other."

"I'd have put my money on Allison." He shrugged then swallowed thickly, twiddling his thumbs. "Um… Pogo… can I… stay here for tonight?" he asked nervously, looking away quickly when Pogo turned to him. "Obviously I can go somewhere else… I just thought maybe… if it's okay-"

"My dear boy, you are welcome to stay whenever you please. This is still your home even if you don't want it to be." Pogo assured him.

Relief exploded across his face. "Thanks."

"Here we are. I had to retrieve some items from Diego's closet, he no longer wears these clothes anymore so he shouldn't mind." Grace came strolling back in holding a stack of neatly folded clothes. "They should be comfier to sleep in."

"Oh um... sorry to be a nuisance it's just the ones I'm wearing are-"

"Terribly dirty." She interrupted him, shoving the new clothes into his hands. "And not suitable for sleeping in. Now you change into those and I'll wash your old ones for you."

"No- No, honestly it's fine. You don't have to do that." He tried again.

She gave him a stern stare, folding her arms. "You're not being a nuisance, Levi."

After trying to hold her challenging stare he eventually gave in with a small chuckle and nodded. "Thank you. You really don't have to though."

Grace beamed. "I'll have them washed and dried out by tomorrow morning for you."

"I see you're now in good hands so if you don't mind Master Levi, I'm going to retire. I'm not as young as I used to be." Pogo told him and began hobbling towards the door while wishing him goodnight.

Grace offered him a hand. "Would you like to head off to bed as well? I'm sure you've had a very big day."

Levi sighed and clutched at Diego's clothes. "Actually could I sleep down here tonight?" he asked from his curled-up position on the couch. He saw her cock her head at him curiously. "It's just… there's a fire down here and well I just thought it'd be more convenient…" he mumbled, making up a pathetic excuse.

"I'll fetch a blanket for you." She said with a soft smile and hurried off.

He sighed in relief and quickly changed into the new clothes, tugging on Diego's grey shirt and black joggers that were luckily elasticated otherwise they'd fall right down his legs. He kept his gloves on, of course. Exhaustion took over him, the day's events finally taking its toll after all the emotional turmoil, the numerous shifts and the encounter with Jason. Oh and the newsflash that the apocalypse is in _eight fucking days._

"I bought a softer pillow as well," Grace told him as she walked back in, setting up a makeshift bed for him on the couch, fluffing up the pillows and organising the blankets. "I can prepare pancakes for breakfast tomorrow if you'd like?"

"I don't want to trouble you." He murmured a response, crawling back onto the sofa and burying himself in the blankets once she'd finished.

"Of course it's no trouble, silly." She responded, coming over to him and stroking his hair from his forehead. The contact didn't make him jump as he expected it too, instead, he felt…. kind of safe. Which was confusing, but he shrugged it off. "Sleep well."

"Thanks…." He yawned, snuggling deeper into the pillow and more content than he'd been in a very long time. He didn't notice Grace stop by the doorway and peer back at him sadly before going to wash his clothes.

* * *

The slumber he'd fallen into was cut short by the sound of somebody stumbling around ungracefully, crashing into a wall and cursing under their breath. Levi blinked his eyes open groggily, pushing himself up from the pillows and trying to focus through the dimly lit room now that the fire had extinguished itself. At first, he felt a little disorientated, unsure where he was exactly, but then the blobby shapes in his vision began registering properly as furniture and his mind caught up with itself. He was still inside the academy.

So… who was making all that noise?

A grunt sounded from a figure toppling into the lounge, making Levi impulsively sink further under the blankets like it would magically make him invisible. After a few seconds, his eyes adjusted and recognised the figure to be Klaus. A… very intoxicated Klaus.

"K-Klaus?" he whispered, having no luck whatsoever. In fact, Klaus began stripping in front of him, kicking off his trousers and tripping at the end of Levi's sofa. Then the jacket and top were thrown off leaving Klaus in nothing but some bright neon, zebra-print underwear that displayed every colour of the rainbow and clung seriously too tight to his groin. "Klaus?!" he squeaked, eyes darting back up to a more respectable level when the man pulled himself up onto two feet again, swaying dazedly for less than a second before falling forwards towards where Levi was curled up.

Levi narrowly avoided being squashed, rolling sideways onto the floor with all the blankets and landing in a tangled heap as Klaus seized his previous position with a satisfied sigh. Awkwardly he kicked at the blankets to free himself then scampered up to check that Klaus was actually breathing and not on the verge of death.

"Hey! Klaus? Are you ok?" he began asking worriedly, seeing Klaus' glazed eyes reluctantly peel open to stare at him for a few seconds before lighting up.

"Levi!" he slurred the word. "Missed you… you little scamp pulling a fast one on us!" he said then let his eyes droop shut again.

"Oi wake up." He ordered, slapping at Klaus's cheek lightly. "What did you take?"

"Stuffff."

"Klaus, tell me."

"Just two." He grumbled into the pillow, holding up two fingers to prove his point. And Levi knew that was the best he was going to get at the moment. With a sigh, he went to get up but Klaus hand blindly shot out from the couch and whacked against Levi's shoulder which made him yelp.

"Ow- what the hell was that for?" he demanded, absentmindedly going to rub the sore spot on his shoulder but Klaus' hand latched onto his wrist before he had the chance. Levi puffed up like a startled cat at the contact, barely managing to keep his cool as he fought an impulse to snatch his hand back.

"Don't leave again. Don't go…" He pleaded hoarsely; eyes still shut. "Thought you weren't real earlier. You're real right? I mean Ben's been here… for years I just couldn't understand why you weren't. You had to be alive right?"

Levi bit his lip and shifted closer, manoeuvring Klaus' clamped hand from wrist and giving it in an awkward squeeze trying to be comforting. "I'm here. I'm real, ok? I'm not leaving. Not yet." He told the man who hummed, seemingly satisfied with the response as his arm went limp. "What am I gonna do with you, huh?" he muttered, hanging his head and releasing Klaus' hand.

Then he set to rolling Klaus onto his side just in case he was sick in his sleep, picking up the blanket and draping it over Klaus's body while trying to keep his gaze strictly away from the rainbow underwear. As he worked on making Klaus as comfortable as possible he couldn't help but compare him to when they'd been children.

He'd grown. _Well duh._ But Klaus had grown taller than he'd expected him too. For some odd reason, he'd always thought that they'd match in height but Klaus had definitely ended up being a good few inches taller than him. He had facial hair as well which was unfair cause Levi still struggles with getting mere stubble, which never looked good on him anyway! But it suited Klaus, gave him this kind of roguish appearance that added to the charm of his flamboyant behaviour. It's a slightly odd concept to Levi that he'd missed the majority of chapters in Klaus' life throughout which he evolved into the man he is today, making Levi burn with wonder. When did Klaus decide to get more tattoos? Where did he live now? What did he do for a living? Why does he take drugs and drink himself into oblivion?

All these questions were bubbling to life in one rapid flurry and he desperately wanted to find the answers to them. Call it hyperfixation but he sat on the ground staring at Klaus for a while too long, trying to work the other man out like he were a jig-saw puzzle that lacked all the pieces. It was a pretty good distraction from everything else. Eventually, he fell into a trance of just watching through the dim light as Klaus's chest rose and fell finding it somewhat… therapeutic.

_Stop being creepy._

Right. Yes. Socially acceptable human beings don't just sit in the dark watching other people sleep.

Cringing internally he decided that he was satisfied enough to leave Klaus without having to be terrified that the guy would die in his sleep due to an overdose or something. He crawled his way across the marble ground to the opposite sofa and curled up there, a little vexed he no longer had blankets or pillows. At least somebody was comfortable though. The fact Klaus was likely going to have a hangover in the morning admittedly made Levi feel a little better about surrendering his bed. The second Levi settled on the sofa his brain whirled to life again and didn't seem willing to allow him the sweet escape of sleep just yet, sending him down a wormhole of worries.

He couldn't help but start feeling a little bad about leaving Klaus… he knew about what Klaus went through as a child, at one point understood better than anybody else at the academy.

And now look at Klaus, resorting to drugs and alcohol. Was it somehow his fault for not being there? Jeez, they were a bunch of misfits alright.

Well, that definitely decided it. He was staying. If not to save the world then maybe just to try and save… _somebody_. If he could. Levi was a mess, so he wasn't sure how much help he would be to anybody. But maybe he could start trying to make an effort.

A reluctant effort still counts.

Eight Days. Eight god damn days before billions of people were supposedly going to die. And here Levi was led on a sofa feeling rather numb about the whole concept. Maybe he should be freaking out more than he is but... shock sure was a bitch, huh?

Likewise, did anybody else actually know about the end of the world? Or the so-called '_end of the world_' that Five was getting all worked up about. Five mentioned telling Vanya so it might be an idea to ask her what she thinks about this whole thing. Was Levi even allowed to tell anybody else about it? Five seemed pretty wrapped up about having trust issues right now so... maybe it would be best to just keep it to himself and let Five do all the orchestrating. Seemed kind of unfair though if nobody else knew.

He must have led there for hours juggling his thoughts before being lulled into sleep by the sound of the other man breathing.

Around 6 am Grace came downstairs to finish the laundry, taking Levi's freshly washed clothes into the living room only to find the white-haired boy asleep on a different sofa to the one she left him on and Klaus buried in the blankets instead. They slept in such different manners, Klaus moved and twisted under the blankets while mumbling the occasional incoherent sentence about something or other. Then there was Levi who kept as quiet as a mouse, curled up into a tight ball with hands resting under his head.

Grace set her hands on her hips and smiled at the pair before heading off to start her morning routine.

* * *

"No…no…no..please no-"

For the second time, Levi woke up because of Klaus, finding the other man shivering and whimpering underneath the blankets. It was light outside now, rays of sunlight peeking through the cracks of the drawn curtains. Distantly cars driving past could be heard alongside the occasional bird singing pleasantly. But those noises were overruled in Levi's ears by the frightened whimpers coming from the other man in the room.

"Klaus?" he tested unsurely, then when he received no response it became obvious that Klaus was having a nightmare. Quickly he scrambled up and began softly shaking him. "Klaus- Klaus! Come on, wake up. Wake up!" he ordered sternly, shaking him bit rougher.

"No-!" Klaus shot upwards, throwing Levi off him and hunching in on himself, trembling.

Levi didn't expect such a strong shove from Klaus and ended up landing flat on his back. With a huff, he propped himself up by his elbows. "One hell of a nightmare." He commented, catching Klaus attention at last.

Klaus was panting, uncurling himself and holding his heart with one hand. "Mmmf. You're still here." He muttered in a much more sober voice than last night, then noticed the blanket draped over his legs preventing him from getting up. He lifted it questioningly. "I'm not this responsible."

"You looked cold." He shrugged then smirked mischievously. "Plus I don't think I've ever seen underwear that small."

Klaus actually had the audacity to waggle his eyebrows. "Checking me out, were you?" he responded suggestively then laughed hoarsely at Levi's scandalised expression. "Ah- out the way perv." He nudged Levi sideways to grab his coat that was amongst all his other abandoned clothes thrown across the floor.

"What? I wasn't checking you out- I'm not a perv! Holy God, I do _one _nice thing for you and this is the kind of thanks I get. Next time I'll let you freeze." He grumbled, crossing his arms in annoyance.

"Yeah, yeah. Cry me a river." Klaus muttered then side glanced him. "Though I'm touched that you're already planning for the eventuality of a 'next time'. I supposed this means we're to be graced with your presence for a while longer?"

"Don't sound so disappointed." Levi retorted, sensing Klaus bitterness in the statement. He knew Klaus was probably upset about everything still.

"Disappointment isn't the word."

"Mad then?"

"Expand your English language and- Shut your piehole, ben!" Klaus snapped which made Levi flinch in surprise before realising Klaus hadn't said his name, but Ben's. Then Klaus stopped rummaging in his coat and stared at the empty couch. "Said with love." He assured the air and blew a kiss.

"Ben?" he parroted in confusion, turning to face the chair then shaking his head. "Hang on are you looking for more drugs?"

"I can neither confirm nor deny that…" Klaus responded, tugging out a cigarette and lighting it.

Levi pouted. "Well stop. You scared me last night. Not to mention nearly crushed me."

Klaus sighed and leaned back against the couch, staring exasperatedly at Levi. "Me? Scared… you?" he asked while exhaling smoke. "Well… my shifty amigo, I was perfectly fine. But the blanket was greatly appreciated nonetheless."

Levi awkwardly fidgeted on the spot, watching Klaus puff out more smoke for a second. "So, want to talk about that nightmare?"

"Want to talk about where you've been for the past... decade and a half?"

He rolled his eyes. "Jerk."

"Bitch." Klaus shot back without hesitation then got up, heading over to the cabinets. "One of these has gotta be gold-plated, right?"

Levi shook his head. "And whatever would you be needing something from in there for?"

Klaus continued searching the cabinet. "Well… you see-" the sound of Pogo clearing his throat made both of them jump, Klaus twirling around with a hand placed over his heart again. "Christ on a cracker! Pogo?"

Pogo was stood at the doorway looking immensely unimpressed. "My apologies, Master Klaus." He said flatly, and Levi couldn't help but snigger knowingly. "I have a query for the both of you."

Klaus leaned over the couch. "Oh?"

"Items from your father's office have gone missing. In particular an ornate box with a pearl inlay." Pogo explained.

Klaus radiated guilt. "Really?" he drawled, eyes flicking to Levi who just rose his eyebrows in return. "You don't say."

"Any idea where it went?" Pogo asked, looking directly at Klaus despite having addressed both of them.

Levi watched Klaus ponder for a moment and had to stop himself from snorting about how see-through Klaus was right now.

Then Klaus shook his head. "No. No. No idea." He responded then hissed at the couch, in the same spot he'd been talking to earlier. That made further curiosity rise in Levi. "Would you shut up!" Klaus growled again.

"Excuse me?" Pogo responded, recoiling from the comment.

Klaus flashed another guilty glance Pogo's way. "Pogo, I didn't mean you, I just... i—you know there's been a lot of stuff I've been dealing with. Just a lot of memories coming up. All those good times. Well, not so much good times. Really awful, terrible, depressing times. Especially because he's back now." Klaus explained, pointing at Levi while crossing the room to Pogo.

"I can leave." He snarked back.

"I'll drag your ass right back if you even think about it," Klaus responded without missing a beat.

"Fine but don't drag me into this." He smiled slightly, raising his hands up in surrender.

Pogo kept a steady composure but was clearly losing patience. "The contents of that box are…priceless. Were they to find their way back to the office, whoever took it would be absolved of any blame or consequences."

"Oh, well, lucky bastard," Klaus replied smoothly.

"Indeed." Pogo glared suspiciously then softened his expression. "Your mother has a stack of pancakes waiting for you both downstairs. I've informed Allison and Luther of your return and I do believe they will be joining you for breakfast," he explained to Levi then glanced disapprovingly at the other man still stood clad in his underwear. "Master Klaus... might I suggest you dress yourself something a bit more decent before you seat yourself at the table." he requested then began heading out of the room.

"Thanks, Pogo, tell Grace I'll be down in just a second. Oh! and we'll keep an eye out for that box!" he added and received a brief thanks before Pogo disappeared out of sight. Levi stifled a grin, sideglancing Klaus. "You totally took it didn't you?"

Klaus groaned and dramatically crashed onto the sofa while murmuring something that sounded an awful lot like 'yep'. Then his head shot up and he glared at Levi, waving the cigarette at him. "You're sworn to secrecy though."

He dragged his fingers across his mouth in a line. "My lips are sealed. I already told you I'm no snitch."

"And automatically just like that you're still the greatest thing to happen to this place," Klaus told him, rolling over to face the ceiling.

"But cross me and I'm gonna have soooo much dirt on you. First, you knock over Reggie's urn now this. Tut, tut" he teased which Klaus just raised a middle finger at him about. Levi snorted and got up, turning away quickly. "Oh my god, would you put some more clothes on already?"

"Peeping tom."

"You're wearing _neon _underwear." He exclaimed, picking up the blanket and tossing it at Klaus which made the man yell in protest because it extinguished his cigarette.

"it's a free country," Klaus grumbled, trying to re-ignite the cigarette. "We took baths together as kids take a chill pill."

Ignoring Klaus he realised he was going to have to start doing something productive now. There was the whole _impending apocalypse_ right around the corner situation which seemed like a pretty pressing matter. Even if he might want to stay in the room and pick Klaus brain about the drug use and the Ben thing, there was still bigger fish to fry. Like finding Five, because Pogo hadn't mentioned him being in the house even though this was their agreed meeting point.

His stomach rumbled.

Ok, first things first. Pancakes.

With a yawn, he got up to stretch. Mindlessly letting his gaze wander back over to Klaus, finding the other man's eyes glued shamelessly to his abdomen where his top had ridden up exposing pale skin. Before he could make some kind of witty comment he had to awkwardly scramble and catch the damn over-sized joggers, having forgotten they were too big on him so it probably wasn't a good idea to stretch and make his body even smaller. Curse Diego for working out as a teenager. Klaus snorted. Immediately his face flushed hotter against his will so he spun around to find his own clothes.

"Are you naked?" Klaus asked innocently.

Levi refused to acknowledge the troublesome heat spreading further over his cheeks as he sought out his clothes, finding them in a folded pile by the sofa he'd been sleeping on. Unfortunately, the one Klaus was now led on. Somebody had a nasty habit of stealing Levi's sleeping spots it seemed.

"What?"

"You were naked yesterday." Klaus expanded, waving his hand like it elaborated the point. "You know, I gave you my coat. Which by the way you left on the floor outside so... rude."

"Ah. Right. I... I'm sorry about that. And no... I'm not naked. " He mumbled with furrowed eyebrows, proceeding to make a point of tugging the sides of his joggers so the fabric extended then snapped back against his skin. "See, real clothes."

Klaus's smirk was positively predatorial. "Let me get this straight, I'm not allowed to lounge around in my panties but you're allowed to show up to a funeral buck naked?"

"_What_? I wasn't- I didn't look naked-" he spluttered trying to defend himself, ending up just getting tongue-tied. "I mean technically I might have been and...well...I _was_ but- I shapeshift, Klaus! It's just easier to be... you know and... well it's not like you could see my privates or anything so - so yeh!" he blurted and if he hadn't been flustered before he certainly was now. "Couldn't see dick. Wasn't naked. End of."

_Just end his life..._

Klaus gave him absolutely no mercy and silently rose his eyebrows, that devious little smirk of his widening.

Levi groaned, shoving his head into his hands, cursing his previous word vomit. "That came out wrong."

"I'm _sure_ it did."

"Oh, shut up." He grumbled, half a mind to welcome the apocalypse with open arms after this conversation. "I'm going to get changed, see you at breakfast." he clutched the clothes to his chest and fled the room to the sound of Klaus laughing.

Jeez, he virtually never had a problem with nudity. Was the academy turning him into some kind of prude after just one day? He's worked in a damn brothel before for crying out loud! Well, he never got teased about it at the brothel. Sort of. Also _yeah_... showing up to a funeral naked...guess that's one off the bucket list. Even if he hadn't LOOKED goddamn naked. Reginald's ghost was somehow behind this sudden embarrassment. It was revenge. Had to be. That sounds totally legit.

On his way to find somewhere to get changed, he tugged out his phone.

No messages.

A breath of relief escaped him.

* * *

**A.N:** Thanks for reading!

**IIChaosII** asked about the technology in this fic, which I'm kind of glad got mentioned. You're gonna have to keep an open mind about it. No there isn't REALLY any modern technology so to say because I liked the retro kind of aesthetic of the show, the other characters won't have phones like Levi does and they may in the future actually question how he has a PORTABLE phone. I want to stick to the show's idea of making it difficult for all the characters to communicate with each other. Otherwise, certain plot points like Patch's death gets affected (You know, cause her death was partly a result of not having a direct line of communication with Diego) If she'd had a modern phone maybe she could have just messaged Diego for backup and he'd see it instantly- you get my point.

BUUUUT it's also an incredibly low-tech phone that's only there to act as a communicator of sorts between Levi and whoever his 'superiors' are. I guess it's kind of like a pager, but he can respond with it? I'll try to go into more detail in later chapters if the other characters notice it (Which they obviously will because wow technology) It's also supposed to stand out as weird because he's definitely not rich enough to buy a phone either so... it might be a hint for you guys as to whoever his 'superiors' are. And if nobody else has really a portable phone then...wherever would he get one of those from?

All to be explored later :)


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